a wank a day, keeps the woody at bay

2007-08-12T23:25:00.001+08:00

omg o_O

more shock..

2006-12-04T15:53:00.000+08:00

kenny heres another shock for ya.
shoustopper is posting
:O

while the boxing match was becoming the hottest topic in town, before and after the turn of events...
this was what shoustopper and wankywong was doing thousands of kilometres away in a small village located in cambodia..

juz a picture from our painting job in cambodia.
more to come..
i think..

2006-12-04T15:07:00.000+08:00

and i swear,

i was shocked when i saw a post from wankywong.

wow.

christmas jus came early o_O

2006-12-04T12:16:00.001+08:00

I Swear

2006-12-04T12:16:00.000+08:00

i swear

2006-11-26T22:00:00.000+08:00

i think singapore girls these days

REALLY need to learn to sit with their leg closed or crossed when they're wearing skirts.

and REMEMBER they are wearing skirts when they finally do uncross their legs.

unless they are hot or wear nice panties.

if not,

please,

spare us the agony.

how do you kill that.. that has no life

2006-11-24T13:16:00.000+08:00

2006-11-12T11:52:00.000+08:00

HELLO PEOPLE.

ytd 3/4 of the wewanks went out drinkin! ( :

and here's two signs which we found rather nice:

LoL LOL

alcoholic breverages ftw klearly!

local talent..

2006-11-09T04:53:00.000+08:00

ok yea i know. wewanks been fuckin lazy, posting vids from youtubes.

but. we cant help it if we want to share fucking nice videos with everyone hehe (:

this guy really talented. Tyler Creasman. future comedian i can tell. but hell no he aint gonna work for mediacorp. mediacorp produces shit comedians and shit comedies. plz tell me none of u watch their prime time comedies. its worse den "jie da huan xi" for the record i hate "jie da huan xi" its super lame and meaningless. okay out of point sorry.

okay yea. hoped yall enjoy the video.
i did (:

Jokes Of The Day - Kenny!

2006-11-03T00:46:00.000+08:00

yesyes, i noe the wewanks have been horribly boring and lazy,

posting vids from you-tube

tsktsk

anyways!

here's some jokes for u ppl! ( :

Q. What's the difference between oral sex & anal sex?
A. Oral sex makes your day, anal sex makes your hole weak.

Q. What's the difference between a bitch and a whore?
A. A whore sleeps with everybody at the party, and a bitch sleeps with everybody at the party except you.

dota song

2006-11-02T20:44:00.000+08:00

what the efff!

2006-10-30T21:42:00.000+08:00

a visit to the toilet....

2006-10-27T20:49:00.000+08:00

u know there are times when u hav a big pile of shit up ur ass tat's waiting to be disposed.

but, there aint the sight of any toilet nearby.

den u start panicking cuz u dun wanna end up having shit down ur pants.
(the feeling sucks, trust me. lol)
(and it stinks. ask daniel or kahwei. lol)

and so u start running about in search for a toilet. with perfect knowledge that the pile of shit gonna come out any second...

when u finally found a toilet, u rushed in, pushed everyone outta the way and head straight for a cubicle while at the same time unbuckling and unzipping ur pants.

and juz when ur ass touch the cubicle, that pile of shit which was half sticking out of ur anus starts pouring out. forcefully.

AHHHHH. those are magical moments. times when u will unexpectedly say to urself "oh man, tat feels so good"
yea u get wat i mean. come on, who can deny tat u've never been in such situations before. and who can deny tat it feels great.

oh well. tat happened to me today (:
wat kind i say. i felt lik i was in heaven when the shit starts pouring out.

but hold on, the story doesnt end here!!
because you were in a hurry for a cubicle, u did not see where ur ass was sitting on.
yea duh, u were sitting on a toilet bowl, but uhh..
public toilets always come with some extra unwanted ingredients >.<

for eg.
1) along with a few strands of pubic hair
2) some puddles of dried yellowish foul smelling urine stain
3) maybe cum?? :S
4) small piles of shit
5) last but not least, the most commonly seen and troubling one... footprints

jus when i was worrying about those ingredients tat might be underneath my ass. sth infront of me caught my attention..

i took a closer look and read the notice..
it says...

lol quite amusing.
was laughing while i was taking a shit.

alright tats pretty much all.

HALLOWEEN PARTY tmr night.
stay tune for pics and info (:

3/4 wewank outing to the ZooOOooO!

2006-10-25T00:40:00.000+08:00

im too lazy to change my username, which is so not true...

BUTBUT anw... ive got the pics from jingyu!
nicoles com is as slow as her and is taking forever so ill update her cam pics later..

SOOooooo our adventure in the wild began one eventful tuesday.
we had news that there was a new wild savage animal loose in the zoo and decided we had to investigate..
(at least that was the aim for most of us... nicole went there to look for mermaids and unicorns. cause she thought they were real. seriously)

so off we went!

we all met at angmohkio mrt station at 10.30 "sharp"
where the old uncle manage to schemingly convince us to buy tickets with the tram ride included...

heres some pics while we waited for the high class transport ( run down small white van)
nicoles bug glasses.

soooo after a bumpy journey clumped together with foreigners trying to speak proper english....
we arrived at the famous mandai reserve!

(bai pose! shua cool!)

after gathering our supplies and breakfast we set off into the trecherous interior of the reserve...

(here we find the babaroosa or however u spell it... anyway these are some weird shit animals.. i saw on discovery channel that cause their horns that grow above their mouth curl inwards.. as they get longer it can poke into their skull and kill them..)
ANW... in this pic.. all you can see in the bottom left corner are balls. which dont smell good

(white tiger. hear me roar.. grr)

Alas.. our main aim was not yet fulfilled
and as we ventured on, a sudden discovery left us all stunned

We all see ahmeng the orang utan as a cute cuddly mascot of the zoo... so we expect her family to be equally "friendly".. but not THAT friendly!

firstly.. id like to say that the zoo people give these animals amazingly creative names =.=
i mean like.. how in the world do you come up with names like hongbao.. pusong.. sayang... i think you get my drift..

which brings me to PUSONG. WTF.

take a look at that ugly monkey. not only is he ugly he's one horny bugger. In fact i think out of that whole family tree hes the ugliest.. other than zabu.. not only did he screw our dear ahmeng. he screwed rodney and ahmengs daughter HONGBAO.. that bastard!

pusong pusong must have a long pisang.

disappoined with ahmeng.. we decided to take a break and watch the animal show.. which basically consisted of a half naked man from the !@$##@ tribe.. which we highly suspected was just the cleaner, a fat seal, an otter and some snakes.

to be continued. (blogger is being a bitch and my pics cant get uploaded)

birthday @ dxo

2006-10-23T00:43:00.000+08:00

its been a looooong looong time since the wewank partied together.

yup in fact the last time when all 4 were present in a party was back in..
err
WTF??

Vaunt! @ M.o.S
30th may

tats lik freaking 144 days ago
one hundred and forty four days ago.. unbelievable man.

main reason was due to promos. i think. if i'm not wrong.

okay anyway yesterday. our 1st post promos party together.
birthday @ dxo.

pictures and information at
http://inotfat.blogspot.com/2006/10/to-start-this-entry-off-heres-game-its.html

great party.
great crowd.
great atmospere.
great booze.

other than the fact tat i overdrank abit and kinda screw up the guy's night.
i guess it was really a good party (:
wat a way to return to the clubs after a long break.

and yea, more to come. so stay tune (:

surprise surprise

2006-10-17T00:12:00.000+08:00

now now now, if yall all think ONLY kenny has pictures of here. yall are so damn wrong. hehehe.

the shoustopper is here to bring yall more upclose and personal pictures.

last night, in a bid to save our dear viewers from all the suspension, i managed to hack into kenny's com...

lo and behold!!

i managed to stole some pictures (:

(i'm sorry kenny!! i think our viewers deserve to see and know more den those eyes and nose and mouth)

okay, since yall roughly know the face..
i shall move on to.

THE body (:

starting from the top..
here she is in her most sexy pose..

followed by..
the bottom..

shake shake just shake shake just shake shake just shake chica shake shake

lastly, here comes the whole package.
a full bikini pose of her (:

ahahaha there u go, THE girl.
THE one tat everyone is speculating about..

yes. now u hav it.
right here on wewank.blogspot.com (:

uh okay, i realised the pics are abit uhh not right eh?
oh well, i'm not too sure abt it, i found the pics on kenny's com in a folder named "secrets (:"

:S
-shrugs..

unless of course...
omg kenny

:O

omg. who can expect this to happen

2006-10-06T20:22:00.000+08:00

SINGAPORE IDOL....

being a singaporean, i'm definitely proud of our very first and second SG Idol, Taufik and Hady respectively.
both singers possess great vocal range and the ability to tackle songs of different generes, are they our nation's jewel? definitely i say.

every season, singapore idol allows the country to spot local talents, low profiles who enjoy and would rather sing behind the doors of pubs and clubs. most of them are unaware of the potential tat's within them, which can be exploit to help further their singing career in the international scene. this is why singapore idol exist, to present opportunities for passionate singers who have faith that they can be the next big thing of the country.

and every SG idol season, during the finals, before a certain song is being sang, Gurmit will always say

this original song was specially written for this Singapore Idol grand finals. and this song will of course, become the first single of whoever who wins this competition....

therefore, we have..

Taufik Batisah singing I Dream
and
Hady Mirza singing You Give Me Wings

when i heard our idols singing them, man, i was real impressed with the quality of the songs. as well as the lyrics, which are very meaningful and inspirational.
wow, the producers of singapore idol are indeed something to be able to come up with such beautiful songs eh. wat talented composers we have here in our country too!

now take a look at this:

hmm, doesnt the song sound familiar??

you're god damn right! it IS the song "I Dream". the song that Taufik Batisah, our very own singapore idol sang on that day he was given the title.
now yall are probably thinking, Leann Rimmes probably liked it so much tat she chose to sing it at such a glamourous occasion.

the truth is,
Leann Rimes sang this song, I dream, at the World Sports Award 2001,the exact same song that was claimed originally and specially written for Taufik Batisah/Sly for the Singapore Idol final showdown in 2004.

so the question is..
how come Leann Rimmes sang it first??

hmm. now i'm starting to doubt the originality of "You Give Me Wings"..

What controversy....

"how r our Singapore Idols (past, present, future) gonna go international, if they r questioned abt their originality???"

2006-10-05T15:02:00.000+08:00

got balls?

2006-10-05T14:58:00.000+08:00

animalz againx

my obsession with youtube docu of stupid humans & animals is growing

... bull does juggling triX

i never knew Macs had such a room

2006-10-04T22:43:00.000+08:00

i saw this sign on a door outside a small room in macs.

and hmm

the room was shaking real vigorously

and people were shouting inside.

oh well.
-shrugs

(:

0..o

2006-10-01T18:22:00.000+08:00

Use The Condom In A Vagina, NOT a Anus dammit! - Kenny!

2006-09-30T19:13:00.000+08:00

omfg check this out

roflmao

this has gotta be the funnier gay shit ever.

2006-09-22T02:19:00.000+08:00

not everyone's irwin

check this retarded noobcake who gets assraped

Just A Little Problem - Kenny!

2006-09-20T23:06:00.000+08:00

OMMGG GO CHECK THIS OUT

http://www.dumpalink.com/media/1148029464/Lost_Reality..._He_Said_She

ROFLMAOOO

Tyson's Da Man - Kenny!

2006-09-20T02:05:00.000+08:00

ok this is totally random.

but i love mike tyson.

and no, u buncha sick bastards.

no in the i-wan-to-shove-my-penis-into-ur-anus kinda love.

anyways here's a timeline of his life and wad he said which i reallie liked:

30 Jun 1966 Mike Tyson born, Brooklyn NY, to Lorna Tyson and Jimmy Kirkpatrick.

1978 Mike Tyson, 12, is arrested in Brooklyn for purse-snatching.

1982 Mike Tyson is expelled from Catskill High School.

Jan 1986 "When you see me smash somebody's skull, you enjoy it."

Feb 1986 "I try to catch them right on the tip of his nose because I try to punch the bone into the brain."

May 1987 "Every shot was thrown with bad intentions. I was hoping he would get up so I could hit him again and keep him down."

9 Feb 1988 Mike Tyson weds actress Robin Givens in New York.

Mar 1988 "Real freedom is having nothing. I was freer when I didn't have a cent. Do you know what I do sometimes? Put on a ski mask and dress in old clothes, go out on the streets and beg for quarters."

Mar 1988 "I love to hit people. I love to. Most celebrities are afraid someone's going to attack them. I want someone to attack me. No weapons. Just me and him. I like to beat men and beat them bad."

Mar 1988 "When I fight someone, I want to break his will. I want to take his manhood. I want to rip out his heart and show it to him."

May 1988 Mike Tyson dents his Bentley convertible in a traffic accident in Manhattan. He gives the $183,000 car to two cops, later resulting in their suspensions.

17 Jun 1988 Robin Givens publicly accuses husband Mike Tyson of domestic violence.
Jun 1988 "Anyone with a grain of sense would know that if I punched my wife I would rip her head off. It's all lies. I have never laid a finger on her."

27 Jun 1988 Mike Tyson knocks out Michael Spinks in 91 seconds.

4 Sep 1988 Mike Tyson crashes his BMW into a tree. The New York Daily News reports three days later that it was a suicide attempt.

9 Apr 1989 Mike Tyson allegedly slaps around a parking attendant in Los Angeles.

1 Nov 1990 A New York City civil jury awards Sandra Miller $100 for battery after an incident in which boxer Mike Tyson grabbed her breasts, insulted and propositioned her. The jury found Tyson's behavior "not outrageous." Mike certainly has a way with women.

18 Jul 1991 In his hotel room, boxer Mike Tyson rapes Desiree Washington, a Miss Black America contestant.

26 Mar 1992 Mike Tyson is sentenced to 6 years in prison, which he begins serving immediately.

8 May 1992 Mike Tyson is found guilty of disorderly conduct and threatening a guard.

25 Mar 1995 Mike Tyson is released from prison.

28 Jun 1997 During the third round of a title fight, boxer Mike Tyson is disqualified after biting off a one-inch portion of Evander Holyfield's right ear.

29 Oct 1997 Mike Tyson crashes his motorcycle in Connecticut, suffering a punctured lung and a broken rib.

31 Aug 1998 Mike Tyson's Mercedes is rear-ended in Gaithersburg, Maryland. According to subsequent lawsuits, Tyson kicked one driver in the groin and punched another in the face before being restrained by his own bodyguards.

Oct 1998 "I know I'm going to blow one day. . . . My life is doomed the way it is. I have no future. I feel bad about my outlook, how I feel about people and society, and that I'll never be part of society the way I should."

Oct 1998 "A lot of young women don't know what they're getting themselves into. A lot of them think it's fun, a game. . . . But they truly don't know what they're into when they lock themselves into a room and engage in sex with a man who knows how to handle a woman."

Nov 1998 "I think I'll take a bath in his blood."

Dec 1998 "I'm not much for talking. You know what I do. I put guys in body bags when I'm right."

Dec 1998 "The one thing I know, everyone respects the true person and everyone's not true with themselves. All of these people who are heroes, these guys who have been lily white and clean all their lives, if they went through what I went through, they would commit suicide. They don't have the heart that I have. I've lived places they can't defecate in."

11 Jan 1999 "I could sell out Madison Square Garden masturbating."

5 Feb 1999 Mike Tyson sentenced to 2 years in jail for assaulting two motorists back in August.

18 Nov 1999 Members of 24-Carat Ferret Rescue arrive at boxer Mike Tyson's estate in Las Vegas, where they take possession of two ferrets starving to death.

24 Jun 2000 After the final bell, boxer Mike Tyson intentionally knocks down the referee in order to continue punching opponent Lou Savarese.

14 Sep 2000 "I'm on the Zoloft to keep me from killing y'all. ... It has really messed me up, and I don't want to be taking it, but they are concerned about the fact that I am a violent person, almost an animal. And they only want me to be an animal in the ring."

20 Oct 2000 Mike Tyson defeats Andrew Golota. After the fight, Tyson is forced to submit a urine sample, which tests positive for marijuana.

22 Jan 2002 A press conference to announce the Mike Tyson - Lennox Lewis fight breaks into an all-out brawl. Tyson later admits to having bitten Lewis during the free-for-all.

29 Jan 2002 "Just to let you know, I'm crazy, but I'm not crazy like that. I might want to have sex in a crazy place, but I don't want to kill or rape nobody or hurt nobody."

29 Jan 2002 "I'm not Mother Teresa, but I'm not Charles Manson either."

1 May 2002 "It's no doubt I am going to win this fight and I feel confident about winning this fight. I normally don't do interviews with women unless I fornicate with them. So you shouldn't talk anymore ... Unless you want to, you know."

1 May 2002 During a press conference, boxer Mike Tyson tells reporters: "I wish that you guys had children so I could kick them in the fucking head or stomp on their testicles so you could feel my pain because that's the pain I have waking up every day."

1 May 2002 During a press conference, boxer Mike Tyson tells reporters: "I'm just like you. I enjoy the forbidden fruits in life, too. I think it's un-American not to go out with a woman, not to be with a beautiful woman, not to get my dick sucked ... It's just what I said before, everybody in this country is a big fucking liar. (The media) tells people ... that this person did this and this person did that and then we find out that were just human and we find out that Michael Jordan cheats on his wife just like everybody else and that we all cheat on our fucking wife in one way or another either emotionally, physically or sexually or one way."

1 May 2002 During a press conference, boxer Mike Tyson tells reporters: "There's no one perfect. We're always gonna do that. Jimmy Swaggart is lascivious, Mike Tyson is lascivious -- but we're not criminally, at least I'm not, criminally lascivious. You know what I mean. I may like to fornicate more than other people -- it's just who I am. I sacrifice so much of my life, can I at least get laid? I mean, I been robbed of my most of my money, can I at least get head without the people wanting to harass me and wanting to throw me in jail?"

1 May 2002 During a press conference, boxer Mike Tyson tells reporters: ""I feel like sometimes that I was born, that I'm not meant for this society because everyone here is a fucking hypocrite. Everybody says they believe in God but they don't do God's work. Everybody counteracts what God is really about. If Jesus was here, do you think Jesus would show me any love? Do you think Jesus would love me? I'm a Muslim, but do you think Jesus would love me ... I think Jesus would have a drink with me and discuss ... why you acting like that? Now, he would be cool. He would talk to me. No Christian ever did that and said in the name of Jesus even ... They'd throw me in jail and write bad articles about me and then go to church on Sunday and say Jesus is a wonderful man and he's coming back to save us. But they don't understand that when he comes back, that these crazy greedy capitalistic men are gonna kill him again."

13 Jan 2003 Mike Tyson is divorced from his wife Monica, with whom he has two children.

28 May 2003 In an interview, boxer Mike Tyson denounces Desiree Washington as "just a lying, reptilian, monstrous, young lady. I just hate her guts. She put me in that state where, I don't know, I really wish I did now. Now I really do want to rape her and her fucking mama."

21 Jun 2003 Mike Tyson allegedly beats the crap out of two autograph seekers in the lobby of the Brooklyn Marriott.

11 Jul 2003 A bodyguard files suit against Mike Tyson, claiming that the boxer punched him twice in the face, breaking his left orbital bone.

1 Aug 2003 Mike Tyson files for bankruptcy in New York.

13 Sep 2003 Mike Tyson attends a charity benefit at Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch. When asked why he came, Tyson confesses "Because I've got nothing else to do."

21 Sep 2003 Rap artist 50 Cent purchases Mike Tyson's 48,000-square-foot mansion in Farmington, Connecticut for $4.1 million.

28 Jun 2004 In an interview with This Is London, Tyson announces that since declaring bankruptcy he has been sleeping in homeless shelters and living off handouts. "I've got nowhere to live. I've been crashing with friends, literally sleeping in shelters. Unsavoury characters are giving me money and I'm taking it. I need it. The drug dealers, they sympathise with me. They see me as some sort of pathetic character... I know I was a tough, bad-ass talking fighter, but I ain't no mob figure. I did my time for the rape. I paid my money to Las Vegas. I paid my dues. I ain't the same person I was when I bit that guy's ear off."

hrmms i thot the last two bolded and red lines were awesome.

oh wells.

random

Wanking Is Definitely Fine - Kenny!

2006-09-18T22:23:00.000+08:00

i was jus gonna drop a stupid post exclaiming my return to contact with civilisation

and let u all laugh at how silly i am

but then i saw the tag on the tag board which asked smth along the line of

"is wanking bad?"

dude.

the answer is NO.

Jus to straighten things out.

wanking DOES NOT give u hairy palms.

wanking DOES NOT make your penis drop off, or ur vagina seal up.

wanking DOES NOT make u infertile, unless u groped a syphillis infested genital before doing so.

wanking is perfectly FINE.

in fact, it is not rare to see teeenager's magazine column's health experts proclaiming wanking as a "healthy form of discovering your new sexual nature/body blah blah blah"

in any case, if u've been a faithful reader of wewank, u'd have read this article which quoted a news article as saying,

if u (a guy) do not wank for 5 days, ur sperms starts dying out and degenerating, releasing free radicals to ur sperm reserves, which destroys ur sperms, realising MORE free radicals, destroyin more sperm blah blah blah

but of cos in this case we do not need any Br or Cl and neither do we need you to slice open ur testicles to expose it to UV light becos its not exactly Free Radical Substitution (Wong Poh Lee will be proud of me for this)

however if u do insist on being obstinate and stubborn like Ghandi (Mr. Loo will be proud of me), and soak ur balls in Cl, chances are u'll end up with bleached scrotum like a moist litmus paper (cant rmb blue or red)

but i must say it does resemble Free Radical Substitution in the sense that the initiation of the production of Free Radicals from not wanking for 5 days is trigger off a chain reaction, and thus not wanking for 5 days jus once is enough to sufficiently fuck ur testicles up

the abovementioned is of cos, the Thesis of my argument (Lee Xiu Li will be very proud of me for this)

the Anti-Thesis is of cos, wanking, like ALL great things, are good when done in good quantity. One must take care NOT to let it degenerate into an obsessive habit. I personally have never liked stepping into a toilet cubicle all stained and sticky and slimy.

Now the synthesis of my arguement (including higher level evaluation, which is worth 4 marks!) is thus

er.

wanking produces positive externalities, and can be considered a merit good. however the society is wanking at a quantity lower than the desired quantity. hence by shifting the demand curve right and taking into consideration the Social Marginal Benefits of wanking, it is wise to have government intervention to bring quantity of wankers from Q0 to Q1, which is why wewank.blogspot.com exists.

yes, indeed, we ARE a governmental organisation set up to boost wanking rates in this country with declining birth rates!

-gasp.

it is true.

-

there u go

i hereby score full marks for History, Chem, and Econs from this essay alone and thus should be exempted from RJC Promotional Examination 2006.

toodles.

Quote Of The Day - Kenny!

2006-09-13T23:08:00.000+08:00

here's a quote which i found rather to my liking:

"She sucks at sucking? Anyone can give a blowjob if it's just putting their lips
around the head. There's a lot of skills to a blowjob. It won't be called a
fucking job if you don't attain the skills and the dedication to work hard for
an orgasm!"

-Mamoyo, 2006

2006-09-12T22:00:00.000+08:00

in conjunction with Daniel's post on me,

i have decided to wear my glasses every day for this week.

hoho.

now DON'T piss me off during this time.

i do NOT wan to have to take my glasses off.....

(the last time i did, George Bush that old f00l and almost the entire globe thot Osama had sent ppl to crash the twin towers and the pentagon)

2006-09-10T00:05:00.000+08:00

as the world come tgth to mourn the death of Steve Irwin aka Croc Hunter aka the n00b who got owned by a stingray,

come,

lets all come tgth,

hand in hand,

and join the wewank on our movement..

oh nonono not jus any movement,

but the eat-a-stringray-a-day movement!

for everyday for the rest of ur life,

eat a stingray,

balachan, steamed, bbq-ed.

wadeva, it doesnt matter.

jus eat a damned stingray.

rmb.

rmb Steve Irwin.

rmb to eat a stringray todae.

everyday.

revelation

2006-09-09T20:59:00.000+08:00

As we all know kenny has been working ever so hard to try and keep wewank alive...

as a token of my appreciation i shall do a beautiful flattering post on him

So what can we say to describe this wonderful friend of ours..

well theyre so many things that can be said.. Handsome.. "Hilarious".. Hunky .. Hot..and the list simply goes on..

so to make things look simple..i shall work on a quote taken from kahweis sister..."kenny looks like cyclops"

at this point i bet all the girls are swooning.. what kenny was thinking..this:
(plus hands moving to eyes and saying) *beambeam

WAH.. handsome pleasee..
BUT! ALAS! what kahweis sister ( evil runs in the blood ) thought was this:

AHH! how can be! thats not the stunning glam boy that we all know!checkout the bling..
Ahh....... now theres the sexy neighbourhood cyclops we know.. oops i meant kenny we know..

THUS! in aid of my dear friend i decided to do some research to prove her claim to be nothing but BLASPHEMY!so the journey started.. and i laboured tirelessly and endlessly into the night.. flipping through photo albums and going through greek mythology archives...

( as Dan brown had said ) What i set out to disprove.. i ended up becoming a believer myself. come to think of it indeed there were similarities noticed before, but i brushed them aside.
As the clockwork and gears in my mind started to move in motion, i was jerked back to the bio topic that we had learned earlier on in the year. Diversity and evolution.

HOMOLOGY: refers to a similarity in characterstics resulting from a shared ancestry even though they may have different functions.
another point that enforced this hypothesis was the geographical location at which kenny is spotted... together with the population he is seen with.. though they last for minimal time together as can be seen why in the next photo, doesnt overide the fact that they cohabitate.

yet there was still a part of me that didnt believe this.so late one night i snuck into his room in hope of finding any useful info..to my horror.. i found his baby photo!

ZOMG!the pictures speak for themselves..

after this revelation.. my mind was a whirl..

WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO!

was i to call the zoo?

was i to pretend nothing happened?

the weight of making such an enormous decision was tearing me apart...

so i decided to post this up... friend or foe.. you make the call.=)

2006-09-09T20:57:00.000+08:00

ZOMG

i never knew everyone loved me so much

http://www.kenny.youaremighty.com/

i am truly happy.

thank you all you kenny-lover,

thank you.

Please hor boys... Dun get caught!!

2006-09-04T23:15:00.001+08:00

i was reading the newpaper like how i would on any other day when something in the sports section caught my attention.

yea, it juz had to be about soccer huh, i mean wat else could it be if its "sports section from the newpaper"
ok but anyway, what caught my attention wasnt exactly about soccer.

NO, its not about some miraculous transfer like how Teves ended up in West Ham
and NO, its not about some sex scandal lik the one Rooney had a while ago (ok la i admit this will catch my attention but lately there is a serious lack of such news)
and NO, nothing about David Beckham's golden balls

hm wait a min.

ok maybe got sth to do with the balls.

but not exactly golden.

maybe black instead

i mean if u're black, theoretically u should hav black balls right?

eh but on the other hand beckham not golden but he got golden balls leh.

ok la watever la i dun care wat colour la.

u guys take a look at this! (and guess the colour urself, i'm lazy to analyse)

i was lik HOLY#*$& !@#!%#@^#@$%.
WHAT THE HELL IS THAT HAND DOING IN THE PANTS!!

i mean lik u're having an interview or getting ur pictures taken, and u put your hands into your pants?!?!

look at the smile on his face. juz look at it.

he cant hide it!
its so obvious....
.... that he is having A HELL OF A GOOD TIME!!

What is the only activiy, which require you to place ur hands in your pants, that can put a smile on your face??

think!
1st. you put ur hand in ur pants.
2nd. you smile.
3rd. your smile gets wider.

see? he cant hide the smile which is getting wider every second.

now guys, please..
never get caught in action on camera or on video

respect the public
respect your own privacy
respect yourself

Pichaaarr of Da Dayyeee! - kenny!

2006-09-03T13:53:00.000+08:00

$#%$^%%#^&

blasted mother faraquar!!

%^%^*&^*&&

i was gonna posta pichaar of this homie in mah school

whose earlobes looks exactly like testicles

but imma find ain't no nothing homie.

-GRUMBALEES

) :

but!

imma managed ta find this other picharrrr sent t me by tian:

and now u noe why imma be typin' like a nigga.

damnnnnnnn. imma be of t3h c00l.

and imma aint shittin' yo man.

now imma knock off back to mahh cribb.

yo.

:D

A proven stress relief method! for all the dearest J2s out there.

2006-08-30T02:14:00.000+08:00

heres a little convo i had with a senior.

[ shoustopper ]: so how was GP?

ß†d: sucks la hahaha
ß†d: but nvm biggest thing is like
ß†d: write personal statement, chiong forms haha

[ shoustopper ]: k la. dun disturb u
[ shoustopper ]: j2 now all very busy
[ shoustopper ]: but still, plz do take some time off to take a wank or sth if u can
[ shoustopper ]: dun compromise wanking over work (:

ß†d: yea i know duh. but now cuz of prelims preparation, very hard to find time for a good wank

[ shoustopper ]: just take a few mins everyday to wank la
[ shoustopper ]: wun kill u

ß†d: yup, tats wat i've been doing. its been scientifically proven tat wanking reduces stress and is beneficial. and according to a reliable source, wewank.blogspot.com, it says "Masturbation has also been reported to enhance self-image, ease depression and anxiety, alleviate premenstrual cramps, and lessen migraine headaches."

[ shoustopper ]: or wank and study and the same time

ß†d: cannot, i tried before. very messy and untidy. sometimes the papers kena stuck leh :S
ß†d: but if its allowed during the papers arh, i confirm full marks (:
ß†d: ok la 9pm alr, i gtg for a short wank. its been 12 hours since i last done it.

[ shoustopper ]: oh ok. good (: 12 hours.. haha thats pretty long. ok bye! rmb.. study hard but dun forget to wank hard k!

ß†d: haha ya i know. k bye!

[ shoustopper ]: eh wait a min... 12 hours ago... WERENT YOU HAVING YOUR GP PAPER?!?!?!?

ß†d has appears offline.

A little stress relief post for all dearest J2s out there.
piece of advice, learn from this guy (:

OK FINE I ADMIT!
THAT SO DID NOT HAPPEN!
i mean, which raffles junior college student would say such a thing..

the real convo:

[ shoustopper ]: so how was GP?
ß†d: sucks la hahaha
ß†d: but nvm biggest thing is like
ß†d: write personal statement, chiong forms haha
[ shoustopper ]: k la. dun disturb u
[ shoustopper ]: j2 now all very busy
[ shoustopper ]: but still, plz do take some time off to take a wank or sth if u can
[ shoustopper ]: dun compromise wanking over work (:
ß†d: duh la hahah
[ shoustopper ]: ya okay
[ shoustopper ]: but still
[ shoustopper ]: just take a few mins everyday to wank la
[ shoustopper ]: wun kill u
ß†d: ………

Fuijitsu Teriyaki Judo Sashimi? - Kenny!

2006-08-27T19:36:00.000+08:00

hello people!

i dunno how many ppl watched Scary Movie 4

well if u didnt

ur an idiot wanker who has been wasting too much time watching deperate housewives while jacking off

or singapore idol for that matter

(not that i wud choose SI considering it almost all guys now)

but anyways!

for those who watched it,

i'm sure ur favourite part is this:

hoho.

anyways this is taken from wespank.blogspot.com

which is NOT NOT NOT affiliated to us or anything at all

klearly sheer coincidence.

Jonah Lomuuuuuuuuuu!!

2006-08-26T22:04:00.000+08:00

for rugby enthusiasts!!!

check THIS out!!

zommmfgggg

...

ok ok FINE

i must confess.

i cannot lie anymore.

my REAL name is actually jonah lomu.

yes,

it is true.

he is i,

and i am him.

that was jus me with my nice tan

and an equally nice haircut

i'm sorry i never came up to confess till now.

im truly sorry

Mai Hum, Mai Hum Mai Hum Mai Hum - kenny!

2006-08-22T20:53:00.000+08:00

click here!

another quality production by Mr brown (( :

*post editted cos blogger screwed up the original one

2006-08-20T23:48:00.000+08:00

HELLO PEOPLE

to all those who were from ri,

you prolly noe who arthur teo wai peng is

no.

arthur teo wei ping

no.

arthur teo wai ping

ahhh that!

that bugger's changed his name so many times we've all lost count of wad his name really is

but ANYWAYS

even if you WERENT from ri,

you'd prolly have seen him about a month ago loitering around rjc canteen

and guess wad

our hansum d00dd00d has made a MTV!

check it out!

ZOMMMGGG

but i must say the piano be of t3h imba

2006-08-20T23:16:00.000+08:00

Found on the console table of one of the computers in the com lab:

wah kao

and we thot ALL rafflesians have at least a decent level of maturity and intellect.

O_o

how much is this better than those stupid scribbles u find in buses,

"cOoLbOibOi LuBbBbxx cUtEgUrLgUrL 4EvAxzZXz WoRxzXZxzxz!!"

"gAnG $%%#^3 iSh ThE BesTEsTzxXzxZ WoRxZxz!!!"

-.-"

get a life plx.

2006-08-19T12:40:00.000+08:00

ZOMG

hello people!!

lol lol

GUESS WAD

wewank.blogspot,

has finally hit 100,000 hits!!!!!!

100,000 hits since 13th Dec!!

thats 100,000 hits in 8 months and 6 days,

100,000 hits in 246 days (assuming 30days a month)

or just,

406 hits daily!!

ok this number may seem rather small,

but factor in the fact that for the first 2 months or so,

there was practically noone reading wewank at all

-BEAMS.

plus not to mention we've had many many looooooooong breaks

leaving the blog super dead

like.ahem.now.

in anycase!

the peak of our blog

was probably during the april till june period,

where we averaged 550 hits a day,

and once reaching an all time high of 800.

yup yup!!

so BIG thanks to all u readers out there!

and i promise u the good ole' wewank posts WILL BE BACK ( :

GOGO wewank.blogspot.com ftw!

NO WANKING?!?!?!

2006-08-18T22:36:00.000+08:00

can u imgaine yourself working one day in your office when your manager comes up and say.....

theres a supervisor coming tomorrow and i dont wanna see any wanking in the office

O_O

if you ever thought of convincing someone to stop wanking, you'll prob receive such replies..

"i became part of this team not because of the pay, but because frankly, the wanking. it was great, it was exciting"

"when wanking, morale is higher, performance is higher, everybody knows that"

"i do not want to be sent to a little room to have a wank like a leper. i want to wank in here"

oh well, watch this. it'll kinda give you the idea what people generally view wanking as.
lol hav fun and enjoy(:

As seen on Break.com
or u can access it at
http://www.break.com/index/noworkwank.html

brought to you by

geriatric1927 t3h imba laoahpek vid blogger

2006-08-18T21:57:00.000+08:00

in light of my occasional adventures with max, rae or sumtimes kahwei on youtube watching documentaries on sharks omgpwning seals,

as well as the stuckinmyhead HARDO GAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY series,

-wriggles hips-

here's smth less crappy and lame,

and a lil more.

down to earth

http://www.youtube.com/profile?user=geriatric1927

check out his series from Telling it all part 1 to part 7

veh nice and calm and stuff

and for the time being,

taggers dun ggrage us plx

we are students afterall!

2006-08-10T17:09:00.000+08:00

From the rest of the Wewanks to Daniel Wong!!!

CHEEEER UP YOU SKINNY MONKEY!!!!!

( :

watch this!

2006-08-09T05:17:00.000+08:00

NC-16 (Mature content and brief nudity)

this is one hell of a hilarious shit
(:

Natural selection..

2006-08-06T22:14:00.000+08:00

ok, since kahwei kindly mentioned Diversity and Evolution in the previous post, i shall give all clueless people out there a brief idea on wat the theory is about. and on top of that, a few brilliantly taken captivating pictures that will blow your mind.
heh (:

Diversity and Evolution...
refers to all the gradual changes over 3 billion years that have transformed life on Earth from its earliest beginning to the present diversity.

this guy called Charles Darwin then proposed a new theory, Natural Selection, to explain Diversity and Evolution.

this is him, when he was 7. SO CUTE RIGHT?? (:

this was when he came up with the theory.

Holyshit! yea you guys are probably thinking what i was thinking.
"What the !@#$king hell happened to the cute lil boy?!?!?"

uh. my guess is.. Evolution!

anyway, his theory was that evolution occurs through natural selection.
and that Natural Selection refers to the differential success in reproduction of different phenotypes resulting from interaction of organisms with their environment

ok sorry. my bad. if u dun understand the above explanation, dun worry. cause even i dun understand them. and that came off from my lecture notes :S

in wewank terms,
Natural Selection means..
if you're stupid you die.
if you're smart you survive. and you're able to live to have sex. which causes you to produce offsprings (which might not be your intention in the 1st place)
but anyway, your offsprings will have sex too. which causes them to produce offsprings (which once again, might not be their intention in the 1st place)
and this goes on and goes on.

so basically its like the survival of the fittest.
you live to outwit and outlast others in order to survive in the highly competitive world.
sounds cool eh?
thats life for you.

to illustrate my point..

this.. is a bird

and this bird is stupid.
note: i said stupid
and so this bird flew into something and ended up lik this:

in 3 parts.
found in 3 different areas.
the headless and wingless body
the bodyless wing
the bodlyless head.

now for a change of statement.

this... was a bird

LOL.
thats NATURAL SELECTION for you people.

now now, dun you wish you are smart??

if you're wondering wat happened to the stupid bird....

think!

2006-08-03T21:24:00.000+08:00

cool stuff

since the topics has been on math and stuff and im too lazy to blog abt anything here's a cool video for bio students out there diversity and evolution eh?

Did You Noe - Kenny!

2006-07-31T22:41:00.000+08:00

that ALL human being started life as female?

YES!

in the early embryoic stage,

the human fetus had ONLY vagina as its genital!

UH HUH!

it is only later in the embryoic stage that in fetus which are to become male,

the clitoris grows and extends out longer to form the penis,

whilst the libia forms AROUND the ovary to form the scrotum and testicles respectively!

AH HUH!

bet none of u all knew that

-smirk.

so before any of u gurls retort and say we dunno how it feels like to have a vagina (or being a gurl for most cases)

damn right we do

we jus cant exactly remember thats all

HA.

Wikipedia eh? - Kenny!

2006-07-30T22:18:00.000+08:00

http://www.uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Raffles_Institution

ZOMMMGG

GO SEE GO SEE

its like CLASSIC man

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

oh my favourite part?

go look at

"the Rafflesian Sprit"

ROFLMAO.

Chandru Would Be So Proud - Kenny!

2006-07-29T22:52:00.000+08:00

hello people!!

todae i received a random chain email which i thot was rather amsuing

now.

i'm sure everyone has seen this damn famous and lame math answer from a student who complained about maths questions being badly and vaguely phrased:

now in case u think that's the only dumb thing that students actually do,

here's more:

i actually thot this was damn funny.. takin expand literally. lawl. but in any case, i think the funniest part was the teacher's comments: "very funny, Peter" lol lol

zomg this is quite funny also luh, no?

left the squareroot sign only

zomg

anyways in payin tribute to these brave souls,

$10 to anyone who dares do those in the upcoming promos exam!!

(unless ur one of the 2 ex-NYGH twins.. where even after losing 25marks u still can get A wan.)

takers, anyone?

Protect your balls people

2006-07-23T00:40:00.000+08:00

In view of kenny's latest post, regarding the security and comfort of female balls. i shall add a simple yet informative one today, to help deepen the selfknowledge of young and innocent boys out there.

now little boys, whatever the chicks have, we as guys, have too.
if they hav balls, we will have too!

take a look at this, and guess its purpose and use

ahahah yea. from its shape and structure, one can easily tell the curves and contours are specially meant for the fitting of a ball.
infact, balls, to be specific.
and if u're thinking "wat kind of balls? wat type? wat origin?"
here's a little illustration of my point

now the mystery been uncovered. yes!
we, as guys, are proud to say that we wear this oxygenmasklikething over our balls (:
to protect the precious balls from the rain sun lightning snow, watever you name it, it protects it. the balls will always stay untouched and unharmed (:

(p.s. it even comes in a female version

LOL look at the distinct difference between both versions!! you can protect no balls with this thing yo! )

guess wat? not only do u hav it at diff shapes and sizes, u also hav it made fr diff materals!
For eg. Metal

now if u wonder, why in the hell do u need a metallic guard over your balls, you just have to imagine all the hazards and dangers that your balls might face one day.....

...the groundbreaking pounding of a hammer...

...the concretecracking drilling of a.. drill?...

...the razorsharp teeth of a chainsaw...

...the devastating firepower of a tank!!

...the highspeeding impact of a rocket!!!!

...and last but not least...
the ferocity and aggressiveness of a WOMAN!!!

haha yups!
thats all for today (:
just a short description of the most important armour a guy should never walk without..

brought to you by..

we did it for the kids
.

Women's Best Friend - Kenny!

2006-07-18T20:54:00.000+08:00

now contrary to popular belief,

diamonds are NOT women's best friend.

good Bras are.

hey,

they're hard to find..

supportive...

they never let you down..

they always hold you up when you are down or leave you hanging..

they make you look better

and is always close to yourheart.

of cos,

the "you in these cases are up to you to determine what they are,

be it yourself,

or your two precious dingalingdings.

so ANYWAYS,

it's come to my attention

that most gurls these days,

still dun reallie noe much about bras!

zommmggg

its almost as if the only bras that gurls ever noe about,

is the sports bra and the typical beige coloured full cup bras.

ohhhh c'moonnnn gurls

u all can do better than that!

its smth u all wear every damn day of your life!

make an effort to noe more about it!

but!

i noe

most of u all either dunno where to learn

or are jus too lazy

well fret not u buncha nitwit

once again,

wewank.blogspot is here to save you and your personal combat against gravity.

so here you have it,

the Idiot's Guide to BRAS.

:D

now!

first and foremost!

the one that EVERYONE noes

sports bra!!

when worn, this is how it looks like:

that's prolly wad all gurls started out wearing anyways

doubles up as a trainee bra, as well as for sports

now why do gurls need a special bra for sports?

its the same reason why guys generally do not like doin sports with boxers.

when u run and jump and stuff

those 2 dingalingdings are like bouncing and flyin all over.

for guys, still okay luh. the two balls so small. (except mine of cos)

but knn. mind you, gurls wan are more than 10 times bigger.

imagine run 2.4

wah lan eh.

those two thangs are like BOINNG BOINNG BOINNNG

zomg.

no.

wait.

that's not very true actually.

well you see.

alot of times,

gurls who're.

erm.

sensitive issue here.

erm.

girls who're slightly less endowed, (thats a huge number, mind you)

usually end up using sports bra all their adolescent life.

not that there;s anything wrong,

but i think its quite sad.

-shrug.

but the thing is,

most of these sports bra are super brightly coloured,

and since the school uniform is quite transparentish,

jus like some cca's jersey.. (ahem.think netball.ahem)

it is not a rare sight to see them anyways -shrug.

ok next up!

the normal full cup bras!

ok this isnt exactly very normal..with all the diamonds and stuff.

but thats more or less how a full cup bra looks like.

when worn, it looks like this:

i think the name is pretty selfexplanatory.

...

no..?

oh

what's a cup.

u nitwit.

its those two bowls which holds the 2 dingalingdings!!

so anyways!

its a full cup cos..

as u can see..

its like a complete half-sphere,

and hence covers the boobs FULLY

and hence, its a full cup bra.

doh

anyways i think most gurls, if they wear a normal bra,

wud be wearing this

apparently its the most comfortable,

and provides the best protection from gravity.

-nodsnods.

next up!

half cup bra!

its kinda like the fullcup i figured,

but its good for people who dun reallie like the idea of having some rather stiff cloth material covering the entire chest area and prefer feeling more free and easy..

but nevetheless,

it provides good support for t3h dingalingdings! ( :

next!

the famed Push-up bra! ( :

haw haw.

ever wondered why sumtimes in an elegant evening gown, certain celebrities look as flat as your classmate,

but yet on certain occasions their dingalingdings are like WHOAZOMMGGGWTFHUGE?

therein lies the secret!

the push up bra!

now,

a push up bra is actually jus a halfcup bra,

except!

it has extra paddin at the innerlower part of the bra,

which looks like this (cross section view)

and helps push the dingalingdings up up and away!:

so anyways!

how do u tell if a chick is wearing a push up bra?

there isnt a CONFIRM tell tale sign

but if u see the gurl's boobs look unusually perky,

and theres this distinct circumfrence ABOVE the boobs, like this:

chances are, shes cheating and her dingalingdings arent as big as they appear to be

lawl.

anyways there're more,

but unfortunately due to some things..(Sigh)

i am unable to find other variaties

but here are some bra novelties!

the tshirt bra!

an innovation from Triumph,

this bra is seamless,

and hence is suppose to be of t3h l337 comfort

klearly for those with sensitive dingalingdings.

-nodsnods.

and last but not least,

the strapless clamp bra!!

zomg COOL right!!!

its my fav

its like some coolio oakley glasses,

except instead of clampin over ur eyes,

it clamps over your dingalingdings!

zomg

so super c00l plx.

PERFECT for that bareback evening gown that you're dyin to wear,

but been too afraif cos u dun wanna expose ur bra! ( :

yeap

so there u have it

the idiot's guide to bras! ( :

hope now some of u all have a better knowledge of the equipment which u need to combat against gravity

and save those two lil dingalingdings.

what's worse than a small boob?

a big saggy one

zomg.

now actually this entry cud have been much much much better

but my mood jus turned awfully.

em

cos for one,

whilst searchin for these pics on google,

mum saw and insists im a pervert and porn surfer

(i shant deny or admit to anything at the point in time)

and secondly..

whilst tryin to source for information, such as the different tpyes of bra,

i left my msn nick as "anyone who has veh good knowledge of bra pls talk to me.its formal"

and my gf saw it..

and shes uber super angry with me.

yeah.

i guess it was awfully insensitive of me..

sigh

im sucha fuckin shithead sumtimes.

in any case.

her nick is

"YOU SICK FUCK HEAD"

hai

ok im sorry i turned this into a personal entryish.

i'll head back to inotfat.

um

anyways i hope u people enjoyed this post

loads more comin up

i jus need my cam ( :

2006-07-14T23:54:00.000+08:00

wewank is like d00med

all the other 3 wewanks are like nitwits who refuse to blog

tamade

anyways here's a shoutout,

any GIRL(s) who like to talk cock and are interested in being a part of wewank.blogspot,

and join me in tryin to keep this damned blog alive,

please feel free to audition with me for a place in the wewank!

and no, dun worry,

basic requirement does not include the following:

- basic diploma in cock sucking
- basic diploma in gangbangs
- a Mastur~~bating~~s Degree in sex.

( :

so thats it.

toodles!

Zomg Stay Away From Me And My Balls, Girls! -kenny!

2006-07-10T22:38:00.000+08:00

go check out http://purefren.net/pureland/viewSi.htm

zomg.

gurls these days sure can fight.

Advert for OMGGG HAWWWT partaye!!! - kenny!

2006-07-09T19:56:00.000+08:00

Hello hello!! Me and my friends are gonna be hosting a mega huge event at Siloso Beach this September!

KrunkMarket@Tanjong Beach! 1st to 2nd Sept, 6pm to 6am, 12 hrs of NONSTOP THUMPING music!! Ticks are priced at $20 per tick, covers entry into the island as well as the party, for 16 and above! Also features a mega huge Bazaar with more than a hundred stalls selling and providing items and services at low low LOW prices! Whoooots!!! Think about it. Hot chicks and washboard ab-ed hunks SWARMING around you as you pick up all those awesome buys! Ohhh mahh gaawd. And no more overcrowded squishy squashy dance floor, You KNOW you wanna be there! What better way to beat the summer and pre-exams heat, than to drop by at KRUNKMARKET?!!

All those interested, you can contact me (Kenny) at 97575348 for tickets!

Anyone interested to be a runner or wanna rent a stall, contact me too! ( :

Taxi Jokes - Kenny!

2006-07-09T17:29:00.000+08:00

me and the wewanks take cabs quite alot.

i noe i do. pretty damn much.

and i'm sure most of my friends do too.

and once in a while,

a cab ride can turn out to be more than just a silly ole ride in a silly ole toyota car,

which goes

"please fasten your seatbells"

a couple of seconds after u board the taxi.

so anyways.

i noe mine did

cos last night after a late night out at devil's bar, newton food centre,

me and couple of guys boarded the taxi.

and then

to cut the long story short,

the driver started bombarding us with some jokes which were damn fuckin hilarious.

to the point he himself laughed so hard he almost got all of us killed

so anyways,

here's all the Taxi Jokes 101.

No. 1:
Qn: Why are the best goalkeepers female?
Ans: Because they can stop two balls with at one go! (Without using their hands at all too!)

No. 2:
Qn:What are the three kings that gave manking joy?
Ans: Nopes..its not King Solomon.. nor issint the King Of Hearts or whatever. its fucKING, sucKING and licKING!

and then mikey starts complaining and says the taxi driver shod stop cos he has virgin ears

and the driver says

"virginity is never in the ear! it can be down there: in the front or at the
back, but never in the ear!"

..

not funny meh?

ok he was damn funny when he said it luh k

-grumbles

anyways he finally ended off with this joke which i thot was rather brilliant:

What did Queen Elizabeth said to her King when they got married?

"The whole(hole) of England is now yours!"

HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAH

HAHA..

ha...

ha..

fuck u luh its quite funny loh

tsk.

Advert!!!

2006-07-08T00:39:00.000+08:00

HELLO PEOPLE

lawl lawl

i be of t3h desperate to do a post

SO.

lawl

GO VISIT http://community.livejournal.com/saccharine1319!!!

its this online shop set up by 3 of our girl friends

it has quite a bigass repetoir of pretty nice jewelleries

ranging from bracelets to necklace ~~condoms and dildos and vibrators~~

so gogo check it out!

on a random note,

i was jus wondering

why is it gurls always get so freaked out by blood,

when for every month of their life from 10 yrs old till 50+,

they have it squirting outta their vagina for a couple of days anyways.

and mind you,

its not a small amount.

-shrug.

seriously.

The Man Don't Get It.

not so BACK!!!

2006-07-05T20:10:00.000+08:00

hello people!

back back :D

bet u all missed us right

must be must be

i see all the restless souls in the tagboard.

-looks..

ok maybe not

but nvm

i can sense it

:D

unfortunately for u all,

the other 3 buggers have not kept their promise

and are still too fuckin lazy to post anything

-grumbles

but hey,

we ARE after all, in the midst of receiving our not-so-good results.

so i promise we'll have some stuff up right after it aight?

starting with an update on all the wewank's marks,

followed by a couple of articles which im very sure the gurls will appreciate ( :

yeap thats all for now

see all u wankers again soon!

Miss us right? - kenny!

2006-06-26T20:32:00.000+08:00

right right?

dun think i dunno ahh

u buncha twits.

lawl lawl.

we even have a reader who's suffering so badly from a newly discovered wewank.blogspot-withdrawal-symptom,

anger.

-looks over to the right.

well i guess i gotta add that onto the present wewank.blogspot-withdrawal-symptom list,

joining the ranks of low sex drive, erectile dysfunction, sexuality disorientation, loss of sight

and blah blah

but hey hey hey

c'mon u gotta understand us.

afterall we're jus a buncha hormone ragin students

and we need to concentrate on our mid years Common Fail

so bear with it.

we'll be back

ok bye now!

o_O

2006-06-19T19:57:00.000+08:00

we shall all be on a hiatus whilst we work hard for common test.

in the mean time

miss us

( :

Bigger Aint Always Better! - Kenny

2006-06-13T18:56:00.000+08:00

well of cos.

we ALL noe that's a lie when it comes to sex.

cos bigger IS always better.

bigger penis..

bigger tits..

bigger...

er nvm

but anyways!

hello people i'm back

my plan to stop bloggin and forcing the rest to do so has evidently backfired,

with the blog being as dead as george bush's dad.

so anyways!

..

..

no wait.

that ole man is still alive.

shit.

erm.

as dead as.

a cockroach.

..

ok u prolly dunno why the fuck i'm sayin cockroach,

but u will by the end of this post.

so anyways!

one fine day i was jus walkin down this flight of stairs..

all sunburnt and tired.

and then i noticed this black lil thingie twitching away at the bottom of the stairs

trudged down..

and saw soome bigass cockroach getting gangbanged..

i meant.

er.

ganged.

er.yuh.

by this buncha small lil red ants

in any case i was so fascinated i jus squatted down there and stared at it for like 10 mins before i finally took out my camera to record it down:

ok the movie is abit boring luh

cos by the time my cam was out

the cockroach was half dead alrdy

blardy ants were imba l337 and totally pwned it.

-shakes head.

in anycase

some guy walked down the stairs

and started staring at me like i'm some mega weirdo cos i was jus squatting down in the middle of nowhere, staring at a cockroach

-grumbles

anyways in the final epic battle,

a few bigass army red ants decided to be gungho,

and fixed their bigass jaw on the cockcroach's big ass:

and fyi,

the army ants of the colony is those buggers with mother big heads

and their bites are of t3h mega fuckin painful

-shudder.

oh wells anyways a cab finally came,

and my gf dragged me away

sigh.

so there u have it.

those small lil ants with their imba skillz pwned that stupid fat cockroach hands down

ggxx, n00b.

so wad's the moral of the story?

size doesnt rlly matter

esp in a fight

so if ur the small skinny and pale lil nugger who gets pwned all the time by club bouncers cos ur idea of a fake id was a paper photocopy of a IC,

i say GO FOR IT.

STAND UP FOR YOURSELF

you can do it!

jus smack the bouncer and own his ass.

like seriously.

er.

yuh.

seriously.

um.

oh yeah.

wewank.blogspot.com is, and will not be held accountable for the consequence of following this advice.

( :

anyways hol's started,

been to a couple of parties,

and the wewanks are very much still alive and kickin

-nods.

anyways hope to see u buncha readers around in parties

and PLEASE SAY HI when u all see us! (if u dun hate us)

for all u know, daniel may decide to perform a striptease for free

haw haw.

now now control yourself and ur erection(s) (whether its the penis or the nipples or the clit or all 3)

bye bye now ( :

Picture Of The Day! - Kenny!

2006-06-03T22:46:00.000+08:00

found outside the toilet at taka..

from boy to gurl!

haw haw

i dunno abt u..

but i think it'd be more meaningful and representative

if its found outside some tranny-spewing clinic in thailand.

zomg

Inside The Bowl (The Sequel) - Kenny!

2006-06-02T22:37:00.000+08:00

rmb this lovely picture?

todae i was at Longhouse eatin my lunch

then nice nice sumin decided to help me buy a goreng pisang (this fried banana thingie)

which looks like this:

zomg

klearly not of t3h appetising

Inside The Bowl - kenny!

2006-06-01T22:26:00.000+08:00

i was jus walking into the toilet outside the canteen

u noe, the stupid handicap toilet which noone ever goes to..

so i thought.

i walked in, tummy all bloated from the team's pizza feast

and oh my holy mother fucking god.

this HORRID stench jus smacked me right in my mofo face

knn

walked towards the toilet bowl...

aie!

l00ks sinister.

at a closer look...

now THAT,

is one hell of a bigass piece of shit.

but hey i guess the person must be quite healthy luh

sucha big piece and floating summore

must be eat alot of fibre or smth

-nodsnods

oh wells.

thank lord i didnt puke after seeing it

and fuck u all buncha nitwit

better thank me

it look fuckin long too take all these pictures

kanasai.

Vaunt! @ M.o.S

2006-05-31T20:54:00.000+08:00

a rather awful night.

but nevertheless,

some pics of the wewanks

hehe yes im like in all pics.

pardon me

hehehe

:D

thats all folks ( :

GOTTA WATCH THIS

2006-05-30T17:17:00.000+08:00

as everyone knows, there are many many people out there trying to reenact viedeos or mtv. trying to make a spoof out of the original one.
yea, and we all know, many people failed. successful spoofs are mostly achieved by professionals, people with proper equipment and professional help.
however, presenting here to you, a group of amatuers making a spoof out of "grillz"

this is one hell of a hilarious shit.
(plz be patient and wait for the load to complete, u wun regret it)
enjoy it (:

brought to you by
http://www.FronkNDegofilms.com/

you can take a look at some of their other videos by clicking on "movies".
they make great videos, trust me.

let the ANIMALS show you how it is done...

2006-05-29T02:48:00.000+08:00

hohoho, its been a long time since i blogged! well not exactly me..i guess kahwei and daniel too
argh damn it! sorry kenny!!
we know you hav been trying hard to keep the blog alive.
but fear not, cuz

da shoustopper is in da house

(:

alright people, as we all know LOVE is sth hard to maintain nowadays. even MAKING IT might be a problem to some of us. we are all stressed out by work, kids, and numerous demands,
so if you ever once wondered,
1. how do you create the right mood for the special night?
2. what kind of presents will melt her heart?
3. should you wear a condom during the date?
4. whether it is right to wank?

please worry not no more!

presenting to you our WEWANK own edition of
"idiots guide to romantic sex - animal edition"
contributed by lions, tigers, toads, earthworm(s), misty&starmie and cat.

sometimes, flowers, wine, a simple candlelight dinner, and a gift (in this case its an antelope leg) can mean "i love you" to any species. this horny lion definitely know wat his partner wants, and this explains why hes allowed to hump her. dudes, learn from him!

next, attire matters!!! sometimes, a little kink can be fun too! this tiger is definitely showing that hes enjoying this sadomasochistic rough play. the female, on the other hand, doesnt mind being his bitch!! however, plz be sure and check with ur partner before trying anything risky. hanging a whip on ur belt and a dog collar on ur neck is definitely a NO NO on ur 1st date, rmb!!

ok, now what did i say about smoking? plz, it is NOT cool. esp when making sweet love, be considerate of ur partner! this is juz plain rudeness and another NO NO for any dates. smoking can come afterwards though. but for the rest, u can try eating, before, during and after.

always rmb, quantity doesnt matter, quality does!! sometimes, 3 is not a crowd. just make sure u are able to get a willing third partner to join in the fun and make sure everyone approves of him/her (usually her) so what if u hav 3? u get twice or even thrice the pleasure and even extra holes too!! (: now think abt it, its tempting huh

last but not least,
there is absolutely no shame in wanking!
Sometimes your partner just might not be in the mood. Take advice from the earthworm, which is both male and female. When their partner isn’t feeling it or there just isn’t one around, get a magazine of "PLAYWORM"! (in our case, "PLAYBOY" for boys and "PLAYGIRL" for girls) So you see, sometimes it’s best to take matters into your own hand. Like we’ve been doing since, er I dunno, when we have hands?

wewank, we wank..
now if u think only WE wank, you are wrong! look at this pussy, he wanks too!!
and he seems to be enjoying himself pretty much... more den if this pussy enters a pussy of a pussy
o_O sounds complex? THINK!!

lastly, i shall end of this guide with a picture.
as kenny says, a picture says a thosand words.
so yea (:

pets are useful. your mama buys them for a reason

Night Out @ random bar - Kenny!

2006-05-28T14:31:00.000+08:00

hello people

whee.

another boring post.

):

blame the other bloggers!!

(as usual)

anyways!

last sat the wewanks were out at this bar beside hotel rendevous or hoever u spell that word.

it was suppose to be like the START OF SCH HOLS bash kinda thing

but it ended up so sucky i almost sucked on a pe--

nvm

so anwyays!

the preparty pictures ( :

looking good looking good!

anyways we went to the bar..

and it was so damned pathetic my gosh.

check out the dance floor at 11:

small...and with a grand population of... ONE!

T_T

ggxx.

but i must say the lightings were pretty impressive...

for sucha crappy bar that is.

anyways the night jus wore on as it is...

oooh yeah

we finally ended up so high

we almost did a full monty:

and yesyes im the fattest and least buff or wadeva

GRUMBLES GRUMBLES.

anyways

that picture was when we were still ALL sober.

fucking shouyee decided to be a hero,

and ended up like this:

and of cos as usual,

kahwei was being his usual helpful self:

(face blurred to protect the integrity of shouyee)

stupid shouyee shod be thankful that we all helped to take care of him

our friend, on the other hand, wasnt so lucky.

blardy bugger got knocked out,

and then his friends tried to carry him, only to realise he's too heavy,

and he jus slumped onto the ground,

and smashed his face against some concrete shit

and ended up lookin like this:

fucking shouyee

lol.

ah.

wad a very eventful and nice way to start the hols off.

kanasai.

and btw

cud u readers pls ask the other 3 stupid bloggers of this blog to blog

bastards.

Meet Our Friend - Kenny!

2006-05-24T22:33:00.000+08:00

hello hello people!

yet another installment of the Meet our friend series!

-claps claps claps.

past few episodes included the Abominable Snowman, Chewbacca, Squidward etc.

and in conjunction with the birthday of a fellow wewanker, which will be tmr,

we introduce to you,

Andrew.

a friend of all 4 wewankers.

o_O.

actually i dunno wad this entry is about,

and neither do i noe wad to post.

but as the saying goes, a picture says a thousand words.

since a picture on my cam is approximately 500kb,

therefore it is save to conclude that 1kb = 2 words.

and seeing that the following video introduction is a whooping 9.11Mb,

and 1Mb = 1024kb,

and 9.11Mb = 9318.4kb

therefore by simple mathematics,

the video introduction to our dearest andrew says a whooooping 18636.8 words!

no wait, chandru whud smack me for this.

theres no such thing as 0.8 words!

so we shod round it up to 18637 words!

yay! ( :

now.

damn right i'd rather upload the video here,

than to type a 18637 introduction on mr. andrew.

ok i've blabbered enuff.

enjoy ( :

not very weird.

not very at all.

Chronic@Indochine Wisma & Weirdass party@ccoclatte - Kenny!

2006-05-22T22:00:00.000+08:00

hello people!

yesyesyes we havent been updatin at all.

blame t3h fellow bloggers!

fucking lazy bastards refuse to post anything

knn.

the last 10 post, excludin kw's dumb rugby post, are all mine luh

-grumbles.

in anycase!

its ok

im back

-beams

now now girls, control yourselves ( :

anyways!

yeap

last sat me, daniel and shouyee went fer Chronic@Indochine Wisma

the turn out was super pathetic:

that's the club at like 11pm

-.-"

anyways apparently someone sent a tipoff email to indochine about underage clubbers..

so the bouncers were uber super crazily strict

zomg.

even reentry requires id luh

knn -.-"

anyways i dunno if its becos of that, or simply jus lousy publicity thts why the party's turnout sucked shit.

oh wells

and of cos, whilst waiting around and stuff, t3h wewanks started the usual camwhoring:

3/4 of the wewanks (:

me and mia

me and winson

shouyee daniel

mia and shouyee

mia and daniel

oh yeahs while waiting, it was like super mother hot

so we decided to get icecreams!

you noe..those roadside 1dollar kind?

HAHAHAAH

and here's the good ole' icecream uncle <3

teeheehee.

anwyays it t00k us uber long to finally get it

and i got in with the help of the kindest, shuaiest dude in the world

sherman sim ( :

his bday happens to be on 2-2-88.

HAW HAW.

how i noe?

dun tell u ( :

anyways to cut long story short.

i ^$$%#$$^$&$ got bounced luh!!

KANASAI.

first time in my life

blardy big head hell.

zzz.

ok shit this is startin to sound like a personal post.

anyways all the wewanks, except daniel the humji kia who was hidin in the club, got bounced

so we met some friends and cabbed down to Cocolatte!

well apparently there was some FHM models thingie happening there luh

knnbccb

when we reach there.

practically all genitals present were penises.

and 2 of the only few girls there were like knnb SUPER HUGE fatass angmoh gurls who were shakin their bodies away on the podium

wah knn.

we almost died from stomach cramp i tell u

-shudder.

oh wells

anyways everyone drank quite abit

of erm. NOT liquor of cos. ahem. jus erm. you noe.. coke... orange juice... red bull.

yuh. stuff like tht.

teehee.

and we got mother high.

i noe i did.

stupid buggers refused to share the ginormous cuppa Hoegarden with me

left me to die alone

kanasai.

anyways we didnt dance much i guess..

stoned and camwhored in gallery hotel..

us( :

the couples for the night. Daniel Loves Shouyee. NOT that gay in the tagboard plx

weiren, stuart, shouyee

went back in,

it was horribly warm,

and we jus ended up chilling by the side of the road.

and er.

climbin trees...

HAHAHA daniel looked like some skinny little monkey

BUT! of cos we all noe he's very buff. ahem. :D:D:D

annd.

er.

camwhore ( :

shaun lim with a stash of money.

weiren, stuart, shouyee

growl

fuggin lousy shitass night.

stupid wanky night

growl

i wud have had more fun watching porn and jacking my night away

tsk.

and tht sums up a horribly boring posts

have a few more coming up

so stay tuned! ( :

Disclaimer: we were all damn red cos we were sunburnt. nothing else. bless you and your goodie imagination.

RRRugby finals

2006-05-15T22:24:00.000+08:00

feel the spirit

Rugby Finals . Wednesday CCK Police Aced . be there or ... ... be square

Educational Material! - Kenny!

2006-05-14T13:24:00.000+08:00

found sitting on the shelf of the rj library...

quietly..seemingly harmlessly..

it looks jus like any other old school comic b00k...

but boy...

has it caused many ~~dick~~ ~~nipple~~ heads to stand up or wad!

-snigger snigger.

presenting to you,

the rj library's version of The League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen!!!

haw haw.

i dunno about YOU people,

but that's wad we at wewank call

an Educational Material.

HAW HAW

:D :D :D

Gimme the ice-cream, dammit! - Kenny!

2006-05-11T10:16:00.000+08:00

haw haw.

tucked in a corner of far east plaza is this nice lil turkish restaurant

famous for its nice lil ice cream.

THIS ice cream

since when was gettin one $1.50 ice cream so hard?

ggxx.

Wewanksutra, t3h Video Sequel - Kenny!

2006-05-09T11:53:00.000+08:00

yes you people read it right..

you've read the words of the sacred doctrine..

you've seen the pictures to eternal enlightenment...

and NOWWWW....

-lightning flashes across background.

you're about to see the VIDEO!!!

~~to order, pls call 1900-we-wank. while stocks last.~~

er.

being sucha kind soul

ive decided to make it accessible by everyone over the internet.

Explicit Content.

you have been warned.

-snigger.

Dance Night @ Victoria Theatre! - Kenny!

2006-05-08T20:36:00.001+08:00

hello people!

another boring post!

yay!

haw haw.

anyways.

the wewanks went down for dance night last fri!!

yay! ( :

overall the dances were pretty nice i guess..

special mention to the last chinese dance with the red fan and the hiphop battle.

veh veh good.

( :

anyways as usual.

a wewank outing aint ever complete without photowhoring!

-beams

anyways due to popular demand by our gay tagger..

we have a picture of daniel gaying..

-gasp.

chenkai!

haw haw.

mr. gay-on-our-tagboard.

feeling sad now?

TWO cute guys,

both taken up

and not by u

WAHHAHA

-sniggers.

anyways we didnt take much pic durin the intermission cos it was short.

so after that

we resumed :D

shouyee in my blazarrrrrr

me in t3h blazaarrrr. lookin extremely hAnSuMxzxz.

hansum stuart ( :

me and daniel. t3h most hAnSuMXzXZxz dudes of the night.

kahwei, yiling, me, clifton.

kah wei looks fucking huge here

the cockle-gobbling china woman.

and of cos, despite the stellar performance of the dance crews, you just cant take the limelight away from our greatest movie start

kahwei DESPERATELY tryin to look cute. sigh. ok but actually he does luh.

kahwei, me and shouyee climbing up this bigass bridge thingie until we decided we were wussys and afraid of heights.

and er. the rest are all me o_O

yup yup

thats more or less about it luh

was suppose to go drinkin after

but eveyrone was like hungry

so we went ta the kopitiam in youthpark to eat.

do go there and try the bbq seafood stall! its reallie quite cheap plus the servings is awesome reallie

yups thats all about it.

oh yeah

photography courtesy of the cocklegobbling china woman ( :

Posterboy, me - Kenny!

2006-05-07T21:21:00.000+08:00

hello people! ( :

since all the other wewanks are being lazy bastards

i shall have fun around here by posting some pics of myself from my camwhore session in this blog

yay

-claps.

So.

todae i went muggin with anthea and co.

wasnt very productive..

but at least i learnt how to draw graphs which sorta resemble a penis:

haw haw.

so anyways whilst goin back to the library to return some books,

anthea decided that i am so hAnSuMzxzxz and hAwTzxzxz,

and i should be a posterboy!

(damn right i am)

-beams.

T_T

so anyways we decided to have a simple trial run in the lift:

hello. meet kenny2. ( :

anyways to cut long story short,

we started goin on a mad fototakin spree where i was to imitate t3h models on those stupid posters u see at shop's entrances.very very retarded.

i am so chio.

i always knew i was hawt.

t3h sleeping beauty. er. almost.

that model is NOWHERE as hot as me plx.

crumpler is hawter than fendi. so says i.

oOoOoh i'm so sexy and sensual. oOoOoOo.

in da crowd, er. yo yo yo.

haw haw. i tried squatting down on the ledge to mimic the pose better but my butt was too big and i cudnt balance ) :

and last but not least, this:

zomg i tell u ah

i had to go cheers and spend $2.20 to buy that stupid bottle of evian water JUST for this stupid 500kb picture.

kanasai.

talk about money well spent -.-"

but anyways over all it was fuckin fun

had a mother of a time laughin at myself,

and not to mention havin hundreds of people starin and laughin at me.

zomg.

one angmoh couple even used their imba huge SLR cam to take pic of me posing

wah.i'm goin to take wewank to the international arena i'm tellin u!

:D :D :D

anyways as u people can see

most of the wewankers are running short of ideas for bloggin

so if anyone has any idea, do drop a tag at the tagboard and i'll follow up on it!

( :

preferably something sexual.

ok.my preference at least.

haw haw.

must ok!!!

if not wewank.blogspot will jus dry out and die.

now, u all dun wan that do u?

AHAHAH.

hogay im off.

and to the other wewankers..

BLOG ABOUT SOMETHING U BUNCHA MOTHERFUCKIN LAZY BUGGERS

ah there.

unity.

to end this off,

fuck u ( :

Rafflesia.Cough. - Kenny!

2006-05-03T21:50:00.000+08:00

haw haw.

hello people.

:D

i'm sure y'all noe what a Rafflesia flower is.

eh?

no?

doh, u buncha nitwits.

it's this bigass flower found in the rainforest of indonesia or smth like tht:

so anyways.

if im not wrong, its suppose to be the biggest flower in the world or smth..

and i dunno about you,

but i think the flower sure as hell look darnass ugly.

it looks like some blown apart genital with the worst case of syphillis/gonorrhea/wadeva-sickass-STD-u-can-think-of, all red and sore... with like pus squirting out.

zomg.

anyways,

that's not all.

this blasted thing also happens to emit a horrible stench which smells of rotten meat.

its to attract stupid smelly flies to it to help pollinate the plant

brave man.

and mind you, we're not talkin about a stench like that silentkiller of a fart u let out in the lecture theatre during econs.

oh noOoOooOoOo.

apparently the stench can be smelt from like hundreds of metres away.

zomg.

imagine a fart which packs so much punch.

woots.

definitely second to none.

..

..

okay maybe except for zhe han's fart. that's be different.

tian mun can testify to it

roflmao.

so anyways!

why the heck am i talkin about this random blasted flower anyways.

well cos it so happens right outside the school,

there's ALSO a rafflesia:

its this condominium outside the school

it's reallie quite nice luh..

its white and bloooooo! (my 2 fav colours! :D:D:D )

and it has pretty decent facilities i guess.

now one thing i dun rlly understand is...

why in the blue mother would ANYONE wanna name a nice beeeeeeeeeg condominium

after a bigass stinkypoo flower?!

doh.

-.-"

the first thing i thot of when i heard abt this nitwit condo was prolly this:

haw haw!!

ggxx.

a bigass Rafflesia flower smack in the middle of beeeeeeg pool.

zomg!

can u imagine how it'd be like swimming in the same pool?

u prolly gotta have bigger balls than Chuck Norris or smth.

oh speakin of which

do visit www.chucknorrisfacts.com!! its a super funny site ( :

ok i shod stop digressing.

anyways!

i still think its horribly dumb to name sucha nice place after some bigass stinkypoo

what in the blue mother was far east organisation thinkin when they named it rafflesia

its like a mum naming her newborn a...

er..i dunno.

bucktoothtom or smellyarmpittim.

o_O

yeap.its dumb,

unless of cos, you intend it to turn out smth like this instead:

then er.

ggxx.

Video Of The Day! - Kenny!

2006-05-01T20:56:00.001+08:00

a familiar sight in lecture theatres..

haw haw.

ggxx n00b.

Illusion @ DXO - Kenny!

2006-04-30T13:04:00.000+08:00

holla people!

not gonna be a talkin cock entry this time

:D

SO anyways.

before i'd go on and talk about our night out clubbin,

i thot i'd better give recognition to our dearest barney for taking 15mins off his econs tutorial to help me with all the figurines for the previous entry.

haw haw.

so anyways!

3/4 of the wewanks were out clubbing last night with our friends..

and oh i jus realise its the 2nd day of the GE campaign.. i think?

ok nvm out of point.

so anyways!

met up in DXO.

me, daniel, shouyee, boon han, mia, bernie, maryanne, josephine, tamara, cheng wei.

er. oh yeah. note. all names mentioned here are purely fictional. er. yeah.

haw haw.

so anyways.

got in pretty darn easily.

at first it seemed like an awfully good crowd..

the gurl-guy ratio were pretty damn good.

so then we went in, and the ratio stayed pretty much the same

but at 11pm, the entire dance floor was empty.

why?

stupid darn dj was playing retro techno/trance or smth

it was super super dumb

ok.

maybe it was pretty funny lookin at some ah bengs dancing to the song which goes

"Y... M C A, its fun ta stay at the Y.. M C A"

haw haw

they were like trying to form the alphabets with their hands and stuff

so anyways.

i was trying to get us a table at the vip area for us

had to open bottles (of er.non alcholic drinks.er.yeah.) of cos

but the organiser was too busy sellin his dumb ticks

so i didnt reallie wanna bother waiting

so anyways

it wasnt worth the trouble anyways.

once the r&b music came on

we jus danced the entire night,

and of cos, stopping once in a while to take occasional shots (of non alcoholic drink. yeah.)

it was quite good drink deals luh i guess?

me and the guys drank quite abit.

anyways it was 1-for-1 from 11pm to 1am

pretty darn good eh?

So anyways.

everyone got pretty darn high (with er. adrenaline. not alcohol.er.yeah.)

and it was pretty darn fun i guess

everyone enjoyed themselves.

i noe daniel did.

hawhaw.

he was grindin with...

nvm

hawhaw.

anyways night was amusin cos..

some people got hooked up..

AHEM AHEM. B. AHEM.

it was amusing seeing em doin that thang with a stranger

-sniggers

anyways.

the night got progressively worse..

seemed like the gurls started disappearing like the ozone layer...

and the guys started pouring in like.

er.

my mucus when i was havin my flu a few weeks back.

-shudder.

anwyays it was jus disgusting the way the guys there behaved luh

most of them were army dudes btw

anyways!

it was like

the moment some gurls come onto the dance floor,

and the guys jus zoomed in like crazy luh

they jus forced their way towards the gurls

which btw, was MOTHERF**KING irritating

zz.

and it was like the guys kept forcing their body against the gurls

zomg zomg.

and the thing is when they decided to move on to some other part of the dancefloor

those guys jus follow them like a trail of erectile-dyfunction ah pek after free viagra.

-shudder.

but oh wells

anyways we decided to leave early!

me and shouyee bought oyster omelette from this stall beside dxo..

and it was SUPER MOTHER GOOD!!

zomg

i was slurping it up like liquid orgasm or smth

-drools

oh wells.

overall the wewanks enjoyed ourselves,

and we hope all those who went did too.

:D

p.s. sorry for the boring entry again

p.p.s. sorry for the absence of pictures. left my digicam at home. ggxx.

Wewanksutra - Kenny!

2006-04-28T21:41:00.000+08:00

hello people.

havent been posting in ages,

neither have my lazy fellow bloggers.

in any case,

i've been too busy moping over the fact that i'm ugly and not hot,

and some other random stuff.

haw haw

ANYWAYS

HELLO once again

todae imma be writing a historical document..

-lightning flashes across background.

a historical document that will enlighten the entire world!!

-lightning hits tree and tree burst into flames

and BRING MUCH JOY AND FRESHNESS TO PEOPLE'S SEX LIFE!!!!

-tree burns and breaks and hits other trees and other trees burn.

-all trees start burning and everyone die!

..

..

..

er.

no wait.

sorry i digressed.

erps.

ANYWAYS

that historical document shall be named..

the WEWANKSUTRA!!!!

or u can also call it The Idiot's Guide To Better Sex if u wanna

mwhahaahahhaahahahs!!!

-beams

and of cos,

wad's the use of a sex instruction,

if its gonna be ALL words and no pictures.

geesh

that's not gonna work!!

OF COS there'll be pictures!

in fact!

we're gonna have many many many many pictures!

-beams!

..

..

..

and no u buncha sick bastards.

no real sex scene

dun be silly.

i dun watch or do porn pls.

-BEEEEEEEEEEEG innocent eyes ( :

SO.

without further ado,

let the WEWANKSUTRA BEGIN:

FIRST UP!!

the simplest and most basic of all moves!

the Missionary:

now this has absolutely gotta be the most basic of all positions. EVERYONE and ANYONE knows it. yes. even that nerd sitting beside u in class. trust me. its pretty damn simple. the gurl lies down and spreads her legs, whilst the guy gets ontop and starts doin all the hard work.

damn. lucky gurls.

and since there's nth interesting about this, lets move on shall me?

next up!

the Doggy Style!

haw haw

jus like the missionary position, every living homosapiens in the galaxy noes what it is.

so ANYWAYS,

the gurl gets down on all fours (in the case of colin and kero, its a guy),

and the guy penetrates from behind

simple enuff?

its prolly the most primitive position if u ask me

practically all mammals do it like tht

haw haw

next up!

Blow Jobs!

er.

sorry no pics for this.

i cudnt make the stupid figure kneel down.kept toppling over.

oh wells.

ANYWAYS!

also known as Cunnilingus,

the gurl jus.er. shove the dick into her mouth.

and ggxx o_O

haw haw.

a variation of this is the 69!!

haw haw

basically its also known as simultaneous oral sex, i.e. the gurl gives the guy a blow job whilst the guy. er. licks the gurl's.erm. yeah.

and Next!

the Cowgirl!!

haw haw.

as Confucius always says..

What goes around, cums around (pun not intended)

no wait.

ok fine

maybe he wasnt the dude who said it

but anyways!

so after the poor guy works his ass off in the missionary position whilst the gurl jus lies down there and enjoy herself,

the tables are turned!

mwhahahas

now the guy can jus lie down,

while the gurl works the hell outta her thighs and hips.

anyways basically the gurl jus bobs up and down and the guy enjoys a good view :D

next next!

er. i cudnt reallie figure out whats the name of this position...

but!

good ole' wikipedia says its jus called the Stand & Carry position.

..

..

doh -.-"

SO.

i guess if u think u have imba biceps like roy or lincoln

and lifting a 40 or 50kg gurl is peanuts..

then i guess u cud try this.

jus carry t3h gurl

she wraps her legs around u

and u lift her up and down and up and down.

definitely not recommended if u have ur Napfa for your next period.

HEHEHE.

and the last one in my list todae!

the Wheelbarrow!!

haw haw

unless ur retarded,

i dun think its very possible for u not to understand why the name's so.

So anyways!

great for gurls

1) with super light bones
2) who are anorexic
3) have muscles bigger than lincoln or roy

basically the gurl lifts her body up with her hands

the guy penetrates from behind, and the gurl wraps her legs around the guy's butt or smth, and thus looking like a human wheelbarrow

yup yup!

todae's jus an introduction of the wewanksutra of cos.

being sucha enlightening and immensely magnificant(?) mantra,

i feel that i should slowly release the contents to you readers

lest you people are not yet ready to learn such great amount of great skillz and knowledge at one go

i have your interest at heart

(and ur genitals too)

howells

anyways yes i noe this post is awfully scrappy and stuff

but that cos im in an awful rush

and im not realllie in the mood to blog

will come up with a better 2nd installation of the wewanksutra

:D :D :D

of cos, credits go out to Stikfas, the manufacturers of these 2 featured figurines

the contents of this entry could not have been rated PG if not for them

(haw haw i see u buncha sick bastard groaning away!! HAW HAW)

tata!

smoking? NOT cool

2006-04-26T23:15:00.000+08:00

this post is inspired by miahiang.
basically when me daniel and kenny went out him last saturday, we had a common topic to talk about, or should i say.. a debate
ok, it was a debate and sadly mia was handicapped
it was me daniel kenny VS mia alone
BUT..
u guys gotta know that mia is huge.
and i mean HUGE
we're all of the same age but hes just one hell of a GIGANTIC HUMONGOUS ENORMOUS kid
1 word.. B I G

ok back to the point,
during the so called debate,
mia said " smoking is part and parcel of life "
and i( representing wewank ) replied " yea.. a screwed up life "

so today.. i shall prove my point and talk about how smoking screws your life and that it is NOT cool.

firstly..
tell me which of the following pictures looks cool

does any of tat looks cool to you?

or tat? can u imagine ur kids doing it..

or THIS??!! can u imagine u urself becoming lik THIS?!?!

conclusion is: smoking isnt cool

next,
u gotta know that u spend ur money buying health problems
u pay money to get ill. to get screwed.
when advertisements encourage pple to buy more cigarettes,
they actually want you..

..to buy this.
you are actually paying for lung cancer and thats DOWNRIGHT STUPID.
yes, it does gives u pleasure, make u feel good, but tats only temporary. the real shit, lung cancer, is permanent.
FYI, lung cancers KILLS. yes no joke

next,
being an environmentalist, i possess a strong passion for saving plants.
and yes, if you dun smoke, you help to save plants too.

tobacco plants.. to be exact.
can u imagine all the poor plants that gotta sacrifice their body to satisfy the needs of people?
people who wanna die early, in fact

let me continue and illustrate my point by telling a story,
there was once a happy young handsome boy named..

yes.. Han Su Ming
he leads a wonderful life, having many girls gushing over him, many guys dying to be like him. basically, he has a perfect life.
until...

he started doing stupid things..

and pick up the stupid habit..

of smoking.
GGXX!

of course Su Ming had lung cancer and was dying.
but this is nothing compared to wat u're gonna see.
recently, it has been discovered that theres actually a NEW side effect of smoking.
and it is called FACIAL DISTORTION.

NOTE:
some people call them heros, flying without wings, defying grafity. however, necks have been broken, back injured, careers ended in an instant. yes, this is entertainment, but the hazards are real. so no matter who you are, or whatever you do,
PLEASE DONT VIEW THIS ALONE.

and so, this was wat happened to Su Ming:

..

..

..

..

..

..

end of story.

so if you DO NOT wanna end up lik Su Ming, which i think you guys wouldnt want to..
please please please..
be smart and..

DUN SMOKE. (unless you're on fire of course)

however if u refuse to listen to my advice,
all i can say is:

to sum up the whole post..

just wanna say:

so..

..

..

..

..

Picture Of The Day! - Kenny

2006-04-23T00:17:00.000+08:00

presenting to you,

the coolest dude in rj

spotted daily prancing around the areas close to the canteen in his coolio jacket,

flicking his coolio hair to one side,

he has gotta be the c00l3st dudexzxz around rjc.

hey, jus l00k at teh hair.

ultra coolx.

gosh.

Kahwei is sexy.

2006-04-19T19:20:00.000+08:00

I guess all u loyal fans out there read kahweis post about the wewankers... but kahwei being as modest as he is.. left out all his good pics... but being the good friend that he is.. gave us all the glam ones...

As a good friend .. i think this cannot go.. we should all share the limelight..

b4 i start.. remember colin and kero? or or.. kennys post just below mine? yea.. i decided to do something interelated..

heres the closest rj has...

slUrp..! ( A cup )
(underwear used to be white once.. wont go there)
doesnt that just turn u on.
see the intense sensual look on their faces (wankywong.. how apt) ..
and the shiny slimy floor
argh! simply turn on luh...
bet colin n kero are going nuts..
*blue stars singing* all rise! 0.o

(shh... hes dreaming about me.. i know it)
my gosh..
bet u guys have never seen such nice curves
in a sexy cotton jacket like that..
and that spiked hair..
make all the ij gals look away in shame..
wooooh! hot stuff.

the real kahwei.. only on wewank..
dun be fooled by his appearance in skool!
hes ashamed people mite not accept him for who he is!
mebe.. if u see him in a quiet dark corner.. and ur really nice to him... 0.o

This Is The Police! Pants Off! - Kenny!

2006-04-17T20:42:00.000+08:00

hello people.

in conjunction with all this huge hoo ha over the gay couple.

i decided to finally get my lazy ass up..

(DUN even think about it)

to post a few pics up which i deem fit of the occasion

teehee.

SO.

i was walkin past New Urban Male shop the other day,

when i spotted this poster which had 2 things very wrong about it:

1) why in the blue mother do those 2 'criminals' have their pants down?!?!

i dunno about you... but.. as far as i can remember, i dun remeber polices' instructions going along the lines of "STOP!! Slowly drop your weapons, Unzip and pull off your pants, and put ur hands on ur head!" if it was.. boy. half the police force wud be gays o_O

in any case, i was jus thinkin, the only other possible scenerio wud be those 2 dudes are gays and were f**king or making out in the public then kena caught by the police ~~who then wanted to join in~~

2) if you zoom in closer at the right side of the picture, you'd see:

dude. DONT tell me there's nothing wrong with that lawl.

its as tho the poor sod's being assf**ked o_O

amazing how they both keep their faces so straight tho.

-shrug

ho wells

that more or less ends the entry.

i hope the pictures do not attract anymore homos.

hasta la vista ( :

HO MY MOTHER#$%^&*( GOD - Kenny!

2006-04-16T12:47:00.000+08:00

take a look at this:

http://www.colinandkero.blogspot.com/

ZOMMGGGG.

mind u,

those 2 guys are MY age (17 this yr)

and they live in a singapore,

and they are normal students like us.

how'd i noe?

the Kero in the blog,

happens to be my pri school classmate.

..

..

..

AAAAAHHHhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhh

from the depths ive riisen

2006-04-14T23:07:00.000+08:00

big hello to all you readers out there... as you could see i havent blogged sinced Wednesday, February 08, 2006 yes ive been lazing around till ive received malicious threats from my co bloggers to kick me out 0.o !!! as this blog means all the life to me hur i had to think of sth to blog!

I'd be blogging ABOUT.............................. us
heehee

well first in line is the fattest funniest freakiest.... and errr fatest guy ! KENNY

HHH is hw he describes himself -handsome
-hunky
-hiLArious

being the friendliest bubbliest most amiable person kenny is a peoples person making friends of all shapes and sizes

but always ends up eating them

sluurp!

next.... DANIEL

as u can see daniel is visibly immensely handsome as he takes to pose in every of our photos

...again

and again

phuket, daniel wong weng fui, shot by wong kah wei, 14.14.2006

SHOUYEE

sy looks lik charmander right

.....

WONG SHOU YEE
Species
Lizard Pokémon
Type
Fire / Height
2 ft (0.61 m)
Weight
18.7 lb (8.55 kg)
Pokédex color
Red
Shiny color
Its normally red-orange body turns golden.
Ability
Blaze
Signature attack(s)
Ember

then there's...... me

the lozer and his balloon

together we're WEWANK luv u guys!

Picture Of The Day! - Kenny!

2006-04-14T12:24:00.000+08:00

a cleaner spotted outside the canteen toilet...

introducing...... LI AO.. (i dun lik him)

2006-04-13T00:35:00.000+08:00

hey people! i was watching primetime news on channel 8...
(ok not really, let me rephrase it..)
i was on the com, which is beside the television, which was showing the primetime news on channel 8 when i saw this guy:

yucks, why the heck is this guy still trying to act cute at such an age?!?!

now if you guys think that this guy is familiar, you are so damn right!
he IS the notorious critic who keeps going around criticising politicians and keeps landing his ass in prison, yup.. LI AO

oh well, his ass is pretty much useless anyway.. because it either
1. ends up in prison,
or
2. ends up getting screwed by kids.

and when i say screwed... i mean this:

now now, doesnt he reminds you of michael jackson??
the white face.. the long hair
except, michael jackson, being the more considerate one, prefer doing the work instead of letting the kid do the work. li ao is one lazy bum..

anyway, the main point is..
this guy INSULTED Singapore!! us singaporeans!!
(ok i dun really know wat he said but it should be sth negative, i mean, nothing good comes out of his mouth...)

...

..

.

(now see my point?? nothing good...)

i was fuming mad when i found out he insulted us!!
i mean who are you to criticise us? u belong to Taiwan so keep ur Taiwanese ass out of Singapore. our kids will never do you!! fat hope.

all of the wewanks are Singaporeans.
in conclusion, Singapore OWNS ur Taiwan ass

these are a few reasons why
1. he shouldnt insult us
2. i dun lik him

firstly,

this guy is a faggot!! and likes being a faggot!! he thinks being a faggot is fantastic!!
SICK ASS!! (now now keep ur ass away fr doctors, they will never do you too)

secondly,

he has boobs!!
its okay to hav boobs, i means girls have them..
but..
but..
WHY THE HECK do you hav to pinch ur nipple?!?!!?
O_O
SICK ASS!! (now now keep ur ass away fr nurses, they will never do you too. i mean, they are females..)

thirdly,

he thinks he's hot!! and sexy!! lik the 2 girls beside him!!
face it, u can never be lik them, so stop trying..

dun believe me? lets compare..
arms.. he has flabbier and fatter arms
tummy.. he has bigger and rounder and a DISGUSTING tummy
boobs.. hmm o_O

.. hmmm

.. mmmhmm

.. OKAY! he wins this!

LAST but not least, and the most important factor..

he has a freaking..
baby, bantam, bitty, cramped, diminutive, dwarf, humble, immature, inadequate, inconsequential, inconsiderable, insufficient, limited, little, meager, microscopic, mini, miniature, minuscule, minute, modest, monkey, narrow, paltry, petite, petty, picayune, piddling, pint-sized, pitiful, pocket-sized, poor, puny, pygmy, runty, scanty, scrubby, short, shrimp, slight, small, stunted, teensy, teeny, toy, trifling, trivial, undersized, unpretentious, wee..
deek!

look at that thing below, try to squint hard,

if u still cant see it, enlarge the pic..

if u still cant see it, cut the portion which the girls are pointing and magnify it 100x
if u still cant see it, print it out and put it under a microscope

if u still cant see it, you see my point..

yea so there u go, this is LI AO, and i dun lik him.

(ps. if xiaxue and rockson u guys happen to read this post, which i believe u will, do us singaporeans a favour and do a post on him to flame his ass!!
u will be doing innocent kids out there a favour too)

wewank event of the year.

2006-04-12T01:00:00.000+08:00

ok me shouyee n kenny were sitting in the canteen after gym..
so we came up with this idea to bring the wewankers to a whole new exciting level..! as daunting as the task may seem.. we wewankers... have always managed to squirt something out somehow or another.. and so we shall prevail yet again this time..

we are... gonna attempt.. attempt...

to make a music video!

lol? ok. well at least thats what we want to do.. whether we can do it is a whole different thing... hahaha cause wewankers are great dreamers... i mean we do require vivid imaginations for what we do dont we....

so... any ideas. any help. would be greatly appreciated..
ohohoh! and hot babes for ....your pleasure .... erpz i mean ours ;)

toodles.

My Girlfriend is one real bitCH!

2006-04-12T00:01:00.000+08:00

yea she is.. no joke..
we do everything together

she lusts for me so much that she drools sometimes..
see those big round eyes.. bigger than manquans 0.o!
and that long tongue...

shes got reddish brown hair
which i used to have...
see that seductive look on her face.
horny bitch

even though we arent married yet..
we share the same bed..
but just like most people who cant resist...
she keeps trying to lick me.
so i take the floor.
and she gets angry..

but we kiss and make up
and again she cuddles up to me once more..
awww.. see her lost in my arms..

yes i am! yes i am!

(doesnt this remind u of donkey from shrek)
she freaking sleeps like this everyday..
one time i asked her why.. she said she thought it was provocative..
(duncha wish ur girlfriend was hot like me...)
i didnt question further..
love transcends such fickle things...

(no ears! just like cheng weis mutated rabbit)
yea thats all folks. off to bed

A Ball Big Enough - Kenny!

2006-04-10T18:06:00.000+08:00

hello people.

last sat, 3/4 of the wewanks were down at Day2 of Singapore 7s.

it was a pretty nice day i guess.

anyways.

so we were jus sitting and watching all the games..

(New Zealand lost. dammit!)

and then we noticed something..

something white...

something roundish...

something boucning

and most importantly,

something BIG.

teehee.

we turned and we saw this:

it bounced....

and bounced...

and bounced...

ok hey hey hey. gurls. stop drooling over that guy in the pic.

ur suppose to swoon over us only!!!

tsktsk.

ANYWAYS as i was saying,

and in that instance we knew...

that it was meant to be..

it was almost God-sent!!

for we, the wewanks, have finally found a ball. ahem.

a ball big enuff to represent us..

and from that moment on, our focus swtiched from watching the ~~two bouncing balls underneath those babe's tshirts~~ ball on the field, to the BIG ball boucning all over,

as we plot the greatest robbery history... the cornerstone of human history..

THE GREAT BIG ROUND BALL ROBBERY!!!

-thunder roars and lightning flashes across background.

..

er. yeah. that's it.

anyways!

as fate would have it.

the big ball ended up amongst the touch rugby gurls..

and being the agile stealthy and not-fat warriors we were,

we and kahwei slowly sneaked our way towards the gurls..

and stole it away!

WHAHAHAHAHA.

immediately, with clockwise precision,

the guys immediately help surrounded me and kahwei

while both of us quickly deflated the big big ball.

and there you have it:

me and kahwei, proud owners of our beloved trophy.

oh er. mr vince also popped in to.

er.

share our joy:

anyways if you people think it was over...

you are SO wrong.

the struggle's far from over!!!!

for soon after,

a thronge of pesky little kids started swarming in and attempted to STEAL our ball from us!

ATROCIOUS!

them! those leeeeetle pricks, dare try to steal the wewank's ball!?

NO WAY.

being the brave warrior we were,

kahwei and i put up a brave fight...

and trumphed!!!

all weary and burnt out,

we decided it was best we hide the treasure away,

and into a plain louya pok bag it went:

ahhhh.

wad a perfect hiding place.

who would ever suspect inside this louya pok bag

lies sucha huge treasure.

we are geniuses ( :

ok that more or less ends the Adverture of the Great big Round Ball Robbery.

but of cos, that wasnt the only thing that happened..

we had mr. The Mask trying to be the next Michael Jackson:

Big fat guys in netball jerseys, Xena, Marilyn Monroe,

me growing biceps that would make all WWE wrestles go cry in their cribs

guys thinking the Nation Stadium is actually the National Bathroom:

2 people gettin lost whilst searching for the loch ness monster:

a boy gettin disillusioned and thinking its actually raining..

saw the tunnel to heaven..

snuggle real warmly with each other..

and a couple of guys in leopard and tiger skin doing drag, animal style:

speaking of which,

here's a video if those 2 weirdoes dancing away:

wad a fruitful day.

:D :D :D

p.s. do watch out for an inflated wewank ball in the canteen some day... some day..

So HANSUM So PwEeeEdYxzzXZx - Kenny!

2006-04-07T21:29:00.000+08:00

Hello people! ( :

i'm very bored.

and yes i havent blogged here in eons.

SO.

hello again.

real sorry to all those who've been dying of withdrawal symptoms

(which is alot alot)

-snigger snigger snigger

so ANYWAYS

past week or so

i've been busy trotting and buzzing around school taking many many pictures.

oh nonono.

not jus any random pictures of cos.

but pictures of people's ezlink card!

MWAHAHAHAHAs.

the ezlink card's photo.. the bane of people's life... everyone's most embarrassing moments..

-sniggers

i noe half the people around either slot their ezlink cards backwards front, or hide it behind other cards jus so noone ever sees it.

but nOoOoOoOo

all attempts to resist are futile, f00ls!!

the Eyes Of Kenny sess everything!!!

(and even through. ahem. clothing. ahem.)

anyways!

Disclaimer: All comments on the photos are TOTALLY 100% jokes and are NOT to be taken seriously. permission have been taken from these unfortunate souls to publish their photos here. HA.

from the wewank cam...

straight from the ~~runways~~ garbage bins of ~~Paris~~ the-school-which-must-not-be-named..

we present to you..

this season's I-Am-So-HansumZXzxZxxx-And-PweedyZXzxz EZ-Link Card Collection!!!

-clap clap clap clap.

FIRST UP!

me and my gf!! TEEHEEHEE.

lets jus say, Lady Luck and Metabolism Man wasnt on our side..

Next!

Isaac Leo, looking like a tortoise with an oversized glasses.

Ong Zhe Han!!!!

HAHAHAAH

the hair looking like he's fresh from [insert the most muggertoad school u noe]. also happen to look like those kinda nerdy little boys i would like to smack on the head when i walk pass em. teehee.

Chee Meng!

HOHO. i think he looked like me in pri sch. all bloated up. but now he so hansum..and i'm still stuck in the same state... ow.

Daniel. looking like the same prick as he is now.

Benjamin Ng aka. Barney!

HAAHAHAHAH. he looked like a swollen little ~~maggot~~ grub back then. HAHAAHAH.

Jing Cong!

2 words - Super Cute.

Bernie aka. BBBB aka. Bernie the Bouncing Ball of Balestier!

Cheryl Neoh :D

Cheryl Yuen!!!

AHAHAH she's my cousin btw. -sniggers sniggers

notice the resemblence? hint hint.tiny slit eyes. hint hint.

Hui Ting!

my pri school classmate. she looked like a malnutritioned kid.

oh did i mention there was once in pri school she almost fainte--- ok nvm i think she's gonna kill me. -twiddles me thumb.

Viola!!! HAHAAHHA

didnt noe she came from the school with the polka dots.

-sniggers.

and she looks like a duck in that pic.teehee.

talk about a real life parallel of the story The Ugly Duckling.

HEHEHE.

Alvin Tan!!

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

HOLY MOTHER GOSH

he looked like some spazoid kid back then!

HAHAahAHAHHA

geesh

but now so hansum

( :

and our favorite ac cb, Boon Han!!

<3 <3 <3

look how innocent he was...

who would have thot he'd turn out (*&^%$# up like this now..

a pity how all that innocence was lost..

AHAHAHAH JKJK.

we all love u boon han!! <3<3<3!!

SuUuUuUu Min!!!

i have no comments.

oh notice the right hand side of the pic.

"Elasticity of Demand"

HAHAAHAH.

classes are indeed fun ( :

Joey!

er. no comments.

and last but not least,

Shouyee aka. Shoustopper!!!

SUPER SUPER CUTE RIGHT

looked like some little japanese kiddo last time!

so KaWaIIxzXz NeHxzXz!!!

o_O

ok nvm

oh wells

hope u people had a good time looking at all this pictures,

cos i noe i did, except for the tummyache i got from laughing too much.

edition 2 of this entry will come out soon.

and NO do NOT start hiding your ezlink cards from me

i will hunt u down

and remember,

the Eyes Of Kenny sees all..

mwahahahhas.

2006-04-06T22:02:00.000+08:00

ever been to the library in RJ?

yea the one on the 4th floor....

the one where u gotta fear being caught for ponning lectures

the one u gotta fear of being upskirted!

0.o BUT Now... Face a new fear!!!
never will u enter the rjc library and sleep in peace again!
only on wewank cam.
we managed to catch this special footage.
just for u loyal readers of wewank watch as the monster preys on unsuspecting victims which he doesnt even know at all.

there u have it.. that poor guy didnt even stand a chance!
brutally and rudely awoken from what could be his only possible place n chance where he could get a girl

since i haven blogged for such a long time..
i shall put up yet another video..
to all u innocent rgs girls...
this is what bored ri guys do in class...
i guess after 10 years of being with boys alone.. it kinda gets to u

The End of Ronald....

2006-04-04T21:47:00.000+08:00

hey hey!
let me give u wewank readers out there a warning!! especially to the girls..

lets say..
one day u pple happen to visit Macdonalds..
and happen you to see a Ronald Macdonald statue on a bench outside..
and it happens to be empty..
and you happen to think of sitting on the bench beside Ronald...

DO NOT EVER THINK OF DOING THAT!!!!!

trust me. according to certain McStudies.. Ronald actually added certain stuff in our McFood that gives us a McTendency to do this:

Note that McTendency works in both males and females. so to little boys out there who thinks Ronald doesnt like BOYS.. you are wrong!

he loves McChubby lik them!!

ok back to the point..

naughty Ronald got apprehended...

apparantly and unfortunately..
by the wrong group of pple..

and this leads to..
A Series Of Unfortunate McEvents.

):

this concludes the McLife of poor Ronald. after spending his life providing us with all the McFats, McCalories, McObesity... he has to die lik this..

wats the McMoral of the story??

DO NOT GET CAUGHT GETTING BLOWN ON CAMERA!!

(trust me when i say tat. Tammy from nanyang poly is a good example of an unfortunate victim of technology.)

Night Out @ Phunk Bar - Kenny!

2006-04-02T15:32:00.000+08:00

helllooooo people!

no updates here for a loooong time

oh wells

neways!

last night me and the guys had a nightout at Phunk Bar.

Victoria and Celeste's birthday party ( :

started off by meetin up at Billy Bomber's for a dinner.

ordered some 4-course set meal

and it was like

HUGE o_O

took me quite awhile to finish em

-nods.

but of cos.

as we waited..

the cam does not sit idle...

shouyee, and daniel being a idiot.

kahwei and mee!

shouyee, and daniel being an idiot STILL

and daniel finally decides to be a normal child...

anyways!

the food fianlly came!

started off with the soup of the day:

yumyum

so so so nice loh!

actually its jus normal cream of muschroom luh

but.

nvm

hehehe.

and before long, the main course came.

mine was some bigass chicken thigh thingie with a huge beef hotdog

ANYWAYS!

after

cabbed down to phunk bar..

and zomfggg.

check out the turn out at 10:30pm:

o_O

erps.

so we decided to drop by the kopitiam across the streets to drink:

and oh.

we. er.

FOUND. ahem. a beer bottle

and decided to pose with it.

of cos, we DIDN'T drink from it luh. OF COS not. of cos we FOUND it.

:D :D :D.

anyways!

we finally decided to jjus get in

and become officially the FIRST patrons of the party

HAHAHAHAHAHA zomffgg.

anyways soon we got tired of starin at a empty bar (of cos we're excluding the 2 fat bartenders... and the kickass pro DJ Andrew T)

we chanced upon this game machine thingie tucked at the corner of the club

we played this game luh

its jus, 2 very very similar pics, then we have to touch the screens to indicate wad's different.

and being the pros we were..

we started pwning all previous record holders.

the first try,

we got this:

click on the pic to enlarge and read the words!

but of cos being the perfectionist we were, we decided to try one more time..

and look wad we got:

wah. we're damn pro plx.

-beams.

anyways.

the party sucked for like a few hours,

and being desperate for some decent fun

we trudged our way down to cocolatte to see if it was better..

but alas.

turned out to be a penis-fest again

zomg.

anyways i got to see anthea that fat ant :D

decided we wun pay cover charge AGAIN for some shitass party,

we decided to trudge our way back to phunk bar,

but of cos, not without takin at least a pic first:

so anyways in the mids of the dancin, we took some pics.

( :

so yeah

anyways the party overall was pretty lousy.

it was like a dickfest.

the ratio of penises to vaginas were prolly like.

7:1 or smth?

-shudder

and all the guys there were damn scary and despo

they like force themselves on the gurls

its damn yuck

-shakes head.

oh wells.

that about it

oh yeah

the kopitiam auntie is a fckin bitch.

she didnt return me my $6 change luh

knn.

):

Picture Of The Day! - Kenny!

2006-03-29T17:26:00.000+08:00

at starbucks:

happy STUDYING?

HAPPY STUDYING?!

kanasai.

attack of the 50 ft MAN!!!

2006-03-27T22:00:00.000+08:00

hey people!! rmb the 50 ft woman that kenny saw??

ok heres the pic to help you people recall.

anyway anyway, guess wat??
wewank found out that this huge woman has a boyfriend!!
study the pic!! u see her picking up and crashing cars right?
you know why? cuz this boyfriend of hers actually cheated on her by having a sexual relationship with another big girl of america..

none other den..

ahahaha. hot right. if i'm the 50 ft woman's boyfriend, i'll also definitely choose liberty over her :D

ok ok. tats not the point.
so during a heated arguement between both 50 ft giants, which involved many hurling of cars and buildings, a huge piece of glass was thrown in between the legs of the boyfriend...

which resulted in...

heavy damages...

math?? english?? watever!!!

2006-03-27T00:54:00.000+08:00

dun u guys think that sometimes math and english kinda contradict each other, or at least tend to confuse you somehow?

ok firstly let me start off with the confusion i had juz now. i was doing math tutorial, with the aid of a Graphic Calculator (GC).
err for those of u who dunno, graphic calculator is the super huge gameboy that u see people carry around in sch, the one which can illustrate humps and curves and stuff lik tat.. key in certain numbers and alphabets and u can obtain the sexiest curves one can only wish for.. yea u get the idea.
ok anyway, i wanted to exit/close an application called "transformations" but no matter how hard i tried, how long i searched, i still couldnt find any options or buttons available that might sound/look lik "press me to exit/close this application"
eventually when i decided to ask a friend, i received a very smart answer.
friend: "select the uninstall option"
me: "o_O go and die!!"
i spent hours searching for the Esc button, and you actually want to con me into deleting my application permanently? and guess wat. it isnt only 1 friend who wanted to con me, its EVERYBODY i asked!!
hmm. ok this made me wonder, maybe tat really is the option. but but but.. how can it be??
Uninstall - To remove completely from a system. [Dictionary.com]
completely?? hmm..
so having no choice, i turned to my last resort and clicked "uninstall"
oh my god! "uninstall" is really actually indeed the exit option!!
what more can i say?? the person who created this calculator is smart but yet freaking STUPID!!

next, contradiction. when i did wat i was told accordingly, i get screwed badly. heres a picture to illustrate and prove my point. the paradox of english and math.. once again

..

-.-"

screw english..
screw maths..

Contrary To Popular Belief (Part 1) - Kenny!

2006-03-26T13:43:00.000+08:00

hello people ( :

i noe most ppl think that the wewankers are a bunch of vulgarity spewing, ego-bulging or rebellious or [insert other shit here]buncha guys.

so todae.

i'm here to show u people a different side of us.

ok maybe not us.

ME

-sniggers sniggers.

oooh me and my bunch of hidden agendas

-beams

SO.

as all rjc-ian shod noe

3-4 weeks back was the Student Council nomination thingie.

-sniggers.

and guess wad.

some individuals jus made the best choice of their life by...

...

...

*ahem*

...

...

voting for me of cos!

-SNIGGER SNIGGER.

as a proof of my statement,

check out the jus a small percentage of my total nomination: (click on the pics to see the full enlarged pic! )

wahahahah.

told u people so

-smirk.

wanna noe wad eventually happened?

stay tuned to find out!

:D:D:D

cute right?? :D

2006-03-22T23:16:00.000+08:00

i think it'll be damn cute to have these bags!!
(:

Year 2006! - Kenny!

2006-03-21T22:40:00.000+08:00

You know you live in 2006 when...

1.) you accidentally enter your password on a
microwave.

2.) you haven’t played solitaire with real cards in
years.

3.) the reason for not staying in touch with your
friends is that they don’t have
msn/friendster/myspace.

4.) you’d rather look all over the house for the
remote instead of just pushing the button on the tv.

5.) your evening activity is the computer.

6.) you read this list, & keep nodding and smiling.

7.) as you read this list, you think about how
stupid you are to read this.

8.) and… you were too busy to notice number 5.

9.) you actually scrolled back up to check that
there was a number 5.

10.) & now you’re laughing at your stupidity.

:D

a wank a day, keeps the woody at bay

more shock..

how do you kill that.. that has no life

local talent..

Jokes Of The Day - Kenny!

dota song

what the efff!

a visit to the toilet....

3/4 wewank outing to the ZooOOooO!

birthday @ dxo

***surprise surprise***

omg. who can expect this to happen

i never knew Macs had such a room

0..o

Use The Condom In A Vagina, NOT a Anus dammit! - Kenny!

Just A Little Problem - Kenny!

Tyson's Da Man - Kenny!

Wanking Is Definitely Fine - Kenny!

Quote Of The Day - Kenny!

revelation

Please hor boys... Dun get caught!!

Pichaaarr of Da Dayyeee! - kenny!

A proven stress relief method! for all the dearest J2s out there.

Fuijitsu Teriyaki Judo Sashimi? - Kenny!

Jonah Lomuuuuuuuuuu!!

Mai Hum, Mai Hum Mai Hum Mai Hum - kenny!

NO WANKING?!?!?!

geriatric1927 t3h imba laoahpek vid blogger

watch this!

Natural selection..

Did You Noe - Kenny!

Wikipedia eh? - Kenny!

Chandru Would Be So Proud - Kenny!

Protect your balls people

Women's Best Friend - Kenny!

Zomg Stay Away From Me And My Balls, Girls! -kenny!

Advert for OMGGG HAWWWT partaye!!! - kenny!

Taxi Jokes - Kenny!

Advert!!!

not so BACK!!!

Miss us right? - kenny!

o_O

Bigger Aint Always Better! - Kenny

Picture Of The Day! - Kenny!

Inside The Bowl (The Sequel) - Kenny!

Inside The Bowl - kenny!

Vaunt! @ M.o.S

GOTTA WATCH THIS

let the ANIMALS show you how it is done...

Night Out @ random bar - Kenny!

Meet Our Friend - Kenny!

Chronic@Indochine Wisma & Weirdass party@ccoclatte - Kenny!

RRRugby finals

Educational Material! - Kenny!

Gimme the ice-cream, dammit! - Kenny!

Wewanksutra, t3h Video Sequel - Kenny!

Dance Night @ Victoria Theatre! - Kenny!

Posterboy, me - Kenny!

Rafflesia.Cough. - Kenny!

Video Of The Day! - Kenny!

Illusion @ DXO - Kenny!

Wewanksutra - Kenny!

smoking? NOT cool

Picture Of The Day! - Kenny

Kahwei is sexy.

This Is The Police! Pants Off! - Kenny!

HO MY MOTHER#$%^&*( GOD - Kenny!

from the depths ive riisen

Picture Of The Day! - Kenny!

introducing...... LI AO.. (i dun lik him)

wewank event of the year.

My Girlfriend is one real bitCH!

A Ball Big Enough - Kenny!

So HANSUM So PwEeeEdYxzzXZx - Kenny!

The End of Ronald....

Night Out @ Phunk Bar - Kenny!

Picture Of The Day! - Kenny!

attack of the 50 ft MAN!!!

math?? english?? watever!!!

Contrary To Popular Belief (Part 1) - Kenny!

surprise surprise